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1 Burnside Humor- Parodies


You Are a Miserable Excuse for a Hero! (Just Make a Choice!)

by Bob Powers

You Are a Miserable Excuse for a Hero! (Just Make a Choice!) Cover

ISBN13: 9780312377342
ISBN10: 0312377347
Condition: Standard
All Product Details

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Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

Why Do All the Nice Girls End Up Getting Kidnapped and Held for Ransom?

In this book, YOU, the reader, are a thirtysomething part-time actor/full-time waiter suddenly caught up in a kidnapping. Julia, the girl you went out with last night, has been TAKEN HOSTAGE. What will you do? Will you go to the police and ask for help? Will you burst into the hideout, killing everyone in sight, then tell Julia that she shouldn’t misinterpret this as some sort of big commitment? Or will you unplug your phone and just get really, really drunk? The choice is yours!

You awake to the sound of the phone ringing.

“Hello?”

You hear a man’s voice. It is muffled. “We’ve got Julia.”

“Wait, what do you mean?”

“We have kidnapped your girlfriend. If you ever want to see her again---”

“Whoa, she’s not my girlfriend,” you say. “I just met her. I mean, I had a good time with her and all, but I wanna take it slow with this one, I think.”

“We understand,” the voice says. “But she’s new to the city, and presently, you’re all she has. Give us fifty thousand dollars by tomorrow or we’ll blow her head off.”

If you want to go and ask your parents if you can borrow fifty thousand dollars, go to page 173.

If you want to have sex with your ex-girlfriend, consider getting back together with her, then think better of it, go to page 183.

BE VERY CAREFUL! You’re directing the story and the CHOICES you make can result in MURDER, GRADUATE SCHOOL ENROLLMENT, TORTURE, MARRIAGE, POST-APOCALYPTIC SLAVERY, UNWANTED PREGNANCY, even TEMPING! It’s YOUR STORY and YOUR LIFE. All you’ve got to do is decide which page you want to turn to. JUST MAKE A CHOICE!

Find more online at www.justmakeachoice.com.

About the Author

Bob Powers is the author of the book Happy Cruelty Day! He has performed at HBO’s Aspen Comedy Festival, and is the creator of the Web site www.girlsarepretty.com. He lives in New York City.

Product Details

ISBN:
9780312377342
Author:
Powers, Bob
Publisher:
Thomas Dunne Books
Subject:
General
Subject:
General Humor
Subject:
Self-actualization (psychology)
Subject:
Plot-your-own stories
Subject:
Humorous
Subject:
Experimental fiction
Subject:
Adventure fiction
Subject:
Humorous fiction
Edition Description:
First
Series:
Just Make a Choice!
Series Volume:
01
Publication Date:
May 2008
Binding:
Paperback
Language:
English
Illustrations:
Y
Pages:
229
Dimensions:
8.32x5.58x.64 in. .49 lbs.

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