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The McSweeney's Book of Politics and Musicals (Vintage)

by

The McSweeney's Book of Politics and Musicals (Vintage) Cover

 

Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

Ever since John Hancock broke into song after signing the Declaration of Independence, American politics and musicals have been inextricably linked. From Alexander Hamilton's jazz hands, to Chester A. Arthur's oboe operas, to Newt Gingrich's off-Broadway sexscapade, You, Me, and My Moon Colony Mistress Makes Three, government and musical theater have joined forces to document our nation's long history of freedom, partisanship, and dancers on roller skates pretending to be choo choo trains.

 

To celebrate this grand union of entrenched bureaucracy and song, the patriots at McSweeney's Internet Tendency (“The Iowa Caucus of humor websites”) offer this riotous collection (peacefully assembled!) of monologues, charts, scripts, lists, diatribes, AND musicals written by the noted fake-musical lyricist, Ben Greenman. On the agenda are . . . 

 

Fragments from PALIN! THE MUSICAL

 

Barack Obama’s Undersold 2012 Campaign Slogans

 

Atlas Shrugged Updated for the Financial Crisis

 

Your Attempts to Legislate Hunting Man for Sport Reek of Class Warfare

 

A 1980s Teen Sex Comedy Becomes Politically Uncomfortable

 

Donald Rumsfeld Memoir Chapter Title Or German Heavy Metal Song?

 

Noises Political Pundits Would Make If They Were Wild Animals and Not Political Pundits

 

Ron Paul Gives a Guided Tour of His Navajo Art Collection

 

Classic Nursery Rhymes, Updated and Revamped for the Recession, As Told to Me By My Father

 

And much more!

About the Author

McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco. As well as running the daily humor website McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, McSweeney’s publishes McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, Lucky Peach, Wholphin, Grantland Quarterly, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints.

Table of Contents

FOREWORD

Wyatt Cenac

My America: A New Action Movie Screenplay by Sarah Palin

Wendy Molyneux

Presidential Stats

Simon Rich

From the Diary of John Adams

Peter Krinke

An Anti-Washington Candidate’s Stump Speech

Pete Reynolds

My 1-1-1-1-1-1-1 Plan

Ellie Kemper

Where Is the Rest of This Graph?

Ben Greenman

The Only Thing That Can Stop This Asteroid Is Your Liberal Arts Degree

Mike Lacher

Debate for Emperor of the Upsilon Sigma Star System

Teddy Wayne

Vote Yes on SPLOST 5

Lucas Klauss

Barack Obama’s Undersold 2012 Campaign Slogans

Nathaniel Lozier

A Comprehensive List of Third- Place Finishers for U.S. President, 2008–2036

David Warnke

The Lesser-Known Slogans of Political Moderates

Kate Johansen and Katie Bukowski

Three Timelines of the American Financial Meltdown Told Through R. L. Stine Book Titles

Matthew Gillespie

Fragments from BAILOUT! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Political Decision-Making in the New Century

Sean Carman

Former CIA Director George Tenet’s Other Excuses

Christopher Monks

A Message from a TSA Full-Body Scanner

Jesse Adelman

A Guest Columnist Still Getting the Hang of It

Ellie Kemper

Extended Trailer for American Demographic 2012

Pete Reynolds

Your Attempts to Legislate Against Hunting Man for Sport Reek of Class Warfare

Mike Lacher

Little Housing Crisis on the Prairie

Susan Schorn

Atlas Shrugged Updated for the Financial Crisis

Jeremiah Tucker

Noises That Select Political Pundits Would Make If They Were Wild Animals Instead of Political Pundits

John Warner

Donald Rumsfeld: Love Doctor

Stephen Elliott

Parallels Between My Living Through Two Years of Middle School and the Two Terms of George W. Bush’s Presidency

Teddy Wayne

Republican S&M Safe Words

Nathan Pensky

Fragments from WEINER! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Someday My Concession Speech Will Be Read by Schoolchildren

Jim Stallard

Starting Over with Pat Nixon

Tom Gliatto

How You Voted

Jonathan Stern

30 and Pregnant

Rachel Friedman

I’m Afraid the Children Are Our Future

John Moe

How Superior Each Bar Feels to the Others

Ben Greenman

Classic Nursery Rhymes, Updated and Revamped for the Recession, as Told to Me by My Father

Jen Statsky

The Adventures of Right- Wing Conservative Robin Hood

Sarah Rosenshine

Two Medieval Physicians Debate Universal Health Care

Blair Becker

The Twenty-First Century Adventures of Tintin

Neil Graf

Youth Culture Findings

Dan Kennedy

April Fools’ Day Pranks to Play on an Unemployed Twentysomething Male Who Still Lives at Home with His Parents

Christopher Monks

Your Protest Signs Are Too Specific

Alan Trotter

Less Powerful Industry Lobbying Groups

Todd Rovak

Fragments from PALIN! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Marxist- Socialist Jokes

Jesse Eisenberg

What If Germany Won the War?

Mike Sacks

Metroid ’s Samus Aran Speaks Out About Gay Marriage

Marco Kaye

Abstinence-Only Driver’s Ed

Suzanne Kleid

A 1980s Teen Sex Comedy Becomes Politically Uncomfortable

Andrew Golden

For a Yellow Brick Wall

Mike Gallagher

The Stability of Data

Ben Greenman

How Bernanke Tackled the Depression, As Recorded 150 Years from Now by Post-Apocalyptic Hobo Folklorists

Grant Munroe

Ron Paul Gives a Guided Tour of His Navajo Art Collection

Jeremiah Tucker

Tribal Matters

Jim Stallard

Early Drafts of Patrick Henry’s Revolutionary Proclamation “Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death!”

Sam Weiner

Unpublished Federalist Papers

Maggie Ryan Sandford

Crate & Barrel Tableware Style+U.S. President=Fictional Delta Blues Singer

Josh Michtom

Patriotic Laundry Metaphors

Doogie Horner

Quiz: Rumsfeld Memoir Chapter Title or German Heavy Metal Song?

David Rees

The Next Wave: Candidate Product Placement

Pete Reynolds

Occupy Main Street!

Teddy Wayne

Operation Middle Class: A Fearful Rich Man’s Rules for Survival in an Increasingly Populist World

Luke Kelly-Clyne

I Will

Henry Alford

Word Problems for Future Hedge Fund Managers

Bob Woodiwiss

Mom’s and Dad’s Campaign Statements

Gregory Beyer

I Probably Shouldn’t Have Opted for the Cheapest HMO

Jim Stallard

Presidents Who Could Also Be Strippers

Noel Wood

State Rules

Colin Perkins

Great Quotes from the End of NASA’s Space Shuttle Era

Jim Santel

Things JFK Might Ask You to Ask Not Today

Kate Hahn

The Songs of Lenin and McCarthy

Jimmy Chen

Fragments from WIKILEAKS! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

The Elements of Press Release Style

Gary Klien

Which Flavor of Ice Cream Do You Want, Daddy?

Miles Kahn

Aesop’s Fables Teach Children the Art of Voter Suppression

Andrew Golden

This Recession Has Spared No One, Not Even the Mythical and Folkloric Figures of Our Collective Western Imagination

Henry Alford and Ryan Haney

POLL: Do I Fully Understand the Concept of Margin of Error?

Ben Greenman

A Letter from the U.S. Department of Education Regarding the Birth of Your First Child

Mark Brownlow

Important Details About Your New Health Care Plan

Dan Kennedy

Robert Gibbs’s Dungeons & Dragons Game Goes Off the Rails

Travis Watt

The Labors of Unemployed Hercules

Luke Burns

Templates to the Editor

Bob Woodiwiss

Slightly Less-Cited Supreme Court Decisions

Rob Kutner

Archaic U.S. Senate Procedures

Lucas Klauss

Congressional Missed Connections

Sloan Schang

Chapter Titles for Rachel Carson’s 1962 Book Silent Spring That Were Rejected for Being Too Alarmist

Caredwen Foley

Fragments from HOT PLANET! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Recycle, Compost, or Trash? A Guide

Jenny Shank

Pickman’s Chicken Farm Is Now Cruelty-Free

Zack Poitras

Create Your Own Thomas Friedman Op-Ed Column

Michael Ward

The Gahhh! Institute

Lucas Klauss

Eyewitness News with Tom Denardo and Cheryl Clayburn

Seth Reiss

How Much I Had to Manipulate the Data to Make It Seem Like Things Were Looking Up

Ben Greenman

Little-Known Facts from the Guinness Book of World Records

Simon Rich

Ongoing Roadblocks in the Mongoose-Cobra Peace Talks

Bob Woodiwiss

The Girls of The Hills Visit Afghanistan

Wendy Molyneux

David Brooks Also Eats Cereal

John Warner

A Straw Poll of Issues on Voters’ Minds for This Upcoming Election, Based Only on the Conversation Initiations of the Morose Security Guard Who Sits in the Lobby of the Building Where I Work

Ryan Haney

Photo Ops to Gain More Than 50% of the Electorate

David Hart

Dance Dance Revolution

Matthew Bonnan

Actual Subject Lines of E-mails I’ve Received from Barack Obama’s Campaign That Sound Like He’s Asking Me Out and Then Breaking Up with Me

Sarah Walke

Fragments from SANTORUM! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Spreading the Good Word: A Missionary’s Guide

Wendy Molyneux

The 700 Club Does the Weather

Alex Kane

The First American Bidding War

Susan Schorn

The Front Porch Campaign, 1880

Chris White

Perhaps Now You Wish You Had Paid Closer Attention to Your Judicial Candidates for County Circuit Court!

Mike Lacher

Ordinary Circle or Pie Chart?

Ben Greenman

This Is a Reelection Campaign Stop, Not a Labor Day Weekend Beach Vacation

Ryan Haney

Laura Wingfi eld from The Glass Menagerie on the 2012 Republican Presidential Candidates

Kate Hahn

No Country for Anyone

John Warner

The Latest Deals from LivingCapitalist

Pete Reynolds

Voter Segments to Watch This Year

Sloan Schang

Accusations Leveled At a Dolphin Running for President

Eric Feezell

God Texts the Ten Commandments

Jamie Quatro

New Fears for the Twenty-First Century

Hannah Tepper

Fragments from STRONG GOVERNMENT! THE MUSICAL

Ben Greenman

Product Details

ISBN:
9780307387349
Author:
Monks, Christopher
Publisher:
Vintage Books
Author:
McSweeney's
Subject:
General
Subject:
General Humor
Subject:
Humor : General
Subject:
Humor-Politics and Business
Subject:
Humor
Edition Description:
Trade paper
Series:
Vintage
Publication Date:
20120631
Binding:
TRADE PAPER
Grade Level:
General/trade
Language:
English
Pages:
368
Dimensions:
7.9 x 5.1 x 0.74 in 0.6 lb

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