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Whatever You Do, Don't Run: True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide

by

Whatever You Do, Don't Run: True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide Cover

ISBN13: 9780762745654
ISBN10: 0762745657
Condition: Standard
All Product Details

 

Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

A hilarious, highly original collection of essays based on the Botswana truism: "only food runs!"

In the tradition of Bill Bryson, a new writer brings us the lively adventures and biting wit of an African safari guide. Peter Allison gives us the guide's-eye view of living in the bush, confronting the world's fiercest terrain of wild animals and, most challenging of all, managing herds of gaping tourists. Passionate for the animals of the Kalahari, Allison works as a top safari guide in the wildlife-rich Okavango Delta. As he serves the whims of his wealthy clients, he often has to stop the impulse to run as far away from them as he can, as these tourists are sometimes more dangerous than a pride of lions.

No one could make up these outrageous-but-true tales: the young woman who rejected the recommended safari-friendly khaki to wear a more "fashionable" hot pink ensemble; the lost tourist who happened to be drunk, half-naked, and a member of the British royal family; establishing a real friendship with the continent's most vicious animal; the Japanese tourist who requested a repeat performance of Allison's being charged by a lion so he could videotape it; and spending a crazy night in the wild after blowing a tire on a tour bus, revealing that Allison has as much good-natured scorn for himself.

The author's humor is exceeded only by his love and respect for the animals, and his goal is to limit any negative exposure to humans by planning trips that are minimally invasive — unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way!

Review:

"At age 19, Australian-born Allison headed to Africa for challenge and adventure, planning to stay no more than a year; having found work as a safari guide, he's still there some 13 years later. In this fun, fearless memoir, Allison shares his experiences taking 'guests' through the African wilderness, trips that often don't go quite as planned-due especially to the unpredictability of the animals around them. Allison is a skilled, funny and vibrant storyteller, dishing arcane bits of wisdom like an expatriate Alligator Hunter: 'I understand a little bit of monkey language, and "kwe" is a sound I listened for. It was an alarm... full blown monkey conniptions were reserved for leopards.' A hilarious chapter recounting a troubled thousand mile trek through the Kalahari Desert finds Allison trying to wave down a passing truck in the middle of the night: 'I realized that the driver would have seen what looked like a very animated sage bush with pasty white hands growing from it... he'd probably go straight to a witch doctor... and ask if there was a curse on him.' Along the way, Allison examines his fellow guides, the struggle with exhaustion, getting lost and the temptation to make frequently visiting animals into pets, as well as some poignant asides on love and death." Publishers Weekly (Copyright Reed Business Information, Inc.)

Review:

"Allison's infectious enthusiasm for both the African bush and his job showing its wonders to tourists is readily apparent, making for a fast and very entertaining read." Booklist

Book News Annotation:

Allison is not only gifted as a safari guide but also as a writer who delivers hilarious insights about living in bug-ridden tents, managing naked royals and determining exactly what type of mouse is invading one's boots. Along with information most of us will only use on safari, such as how to approach a pool filled with hippos, he includes truly useful tips such as how to tell whether a charging elephant is only joshing or if your heirs will have to rinse off his feet to collect your remains. Some of the most bizarre critters are the human ones, but Allison's reflections on the magnificent animals of his workplace are witty, lyrical and moving. Allison includes exceptional maps and photos. Annotation ©2008 Book News, Inc., Portland, OR (booknews.com)

Synopsis:

A hilarious, highly original collection of essays based on the Botswana truism: “only food runs!” With a new introduction and new material from the author

Synopsis:

Welcome to the African bush, where the animals are fierce, the tourists can be wild, and only the food runs!
 
Whatever You Do, Dont Run is a hilarious collection of true tales from top ­safari guide Peter Allison. In a place where the wrong behavior could get you eaten, Allison has survived face-to-face encounters with big cats, angry ­elephants, and the worlds most unpredictable animals—herds of untamed tourists and foolhardy guides whose outrageous antics sometimes make them even more dangerous than a pride of hungry lions!

Join Allison as he faces down charging lions—twice; searches for a drunk, half-naked tourist who happens to be a member of the British royal family; drives a Land Rover full of tourists into a lagoon full of hippos; and adopts the most ­vicious animal in Africa as his “pet.” Full of lively humor and a genuine love and respect for Botswana and its rich wildlife, Whatever You Do, Dont Run takes you to where the wild things are and introduces you to a place where every day is a new adventure!

Synopsis:

A hilarious, highly original collection of essays based on the Botswana truism: only food runs! Allison presents the guides-eye view of living in the bush, confronting the worlds fiercest terrain of wild animals, and managing herds of gaping tourists.

About the Author

Peter Allison is originally from Sydney, Australia. His safaris have been featured in National Geographic, Conde Nast Traveler, and on television programs such as Jack Hanna's Animal Adventures. He travels frequently to speaking appearances, and splits most of his time between Botswana, Sydney, and San Francisco.

What Our Readers Are Saying

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Average customer rating based on 2 comments:

Donzilla, February 19, 2008 (view all comments by Donzilla)
Saw the cover, picked it up... Next thing I know it was 60 minutes later -- I was totally absorbed. I walked to the checkout counter and bought it straightaway.

I spent some time in Africa and went on Safari and Peter Allison's witty prose and mischievous humor took me right back there for another grand old time. My Wife and I read the entire book out loud to each other, alternating chapters.

We wept, we cried, we laughed, and we nearly needed a change of pants at certain points. An excellent work! I'm buying copies for all my friends!
Was this comment helpful? | Yes | No
(2 of 4 readers found this comment helpful)
clelab20, December 20, 2007 (view all comments by clelab20)
Never have I read a book that made my heart jump and that took my breath away like this one did, and trust me, I can't count the books I've read. It made me FEEL for the event that was happening and truly connect with what was going on in each story told. Maybe I am a little biased as i love Africa and wildlife and the adventures he speaks of but the whole point of reading a book is either because you are interested in the subject or need to be educated on the subject. This book does both, I wrote notes in the book of new things I learned, and talk about a biology lesson!! My knowledge of animals has expanded as well as my respect for the attitudes of the human animal. I love a book I can come out of reading and feel smarter, now that's a great book. Well done Peter Allison, you have won me over again and again.
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(6 of 7 readers found this comment helpful)
View all 2 comments

Product Details

ISBN:
9780762745654
Author:
Allison, Peter
Publisher:
Lyons Press
Subject:
Africa
Subject:
Essays & Travelogues
Subject:
Safaris
Subject:
Botswana
Subject:
Africa - General
Subject:
Allison, Peter
Subject:
Safari guides - Botswana
Subject:
TRAVEL / Africa
Copyright:
Edition Number:
First edition
Edition Description:
Trade Paper
Publication Date:
20071031
Binding:
TRADE PAPER
Language:
English
Illustrations:
8-page color insert
Pages:
272
Dimensions:
8 x 5.5 in

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Related Subjects


Science and Mathematics » Nature Studies » African Wildlife
Science and Mathematics » Nature Studies » World Wildlife
Travel » Africa » General
Travel » Travel Writing » Africa and Middle East
Travel » Travel Writing » General

Whatever You Do, Don't Run: True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide Used Trade Paper
0 stars - 0 reviews
$10.95 In Stock
Product details 272 pages Lyons Press - English 9780762745654 Reviews:
"Publishers Weekly Review" by , "At age 19, Australian-born Allison headed to Africa for challenge and adventure, planning to stay no more than a year; having found work as a safari guide, he's still there some 13 years later. In this fun, fearless memoir, Allison shares his experiences taking 'guests' through the African wilderness, trips that often don't go quite as planned-due especially to the unpredictability of the animals around them. Allison is a skilled, funny and vibrant storyteller, dishing arcane bits of wisdom like an expatriate Alligator Hunter: 'I understand a little bit of monkey language, and "kwe" is a sound I listened for. It was an alarm... full blown monkey conniptions were reserved for leopards.' A hilarious chapter recounting a troubled thousand mile trek through the Kalahari Desert finds Allison trying to wave down a passing truck in the middle of the night: 'I realized that the driver would have seen what looked like a very animated sage bush with pasty white hands growing from it... he'd probably go straight to a witch doctor... and ask if there was a curse on him.' Along the way, Allison examines his fellow guides, the struggle with exhaustion, getting lost and the temptation to make frequently visiting animals into pets, as well as some poignant asides on love and death." Publishers Weekly (Copyright Reed Business Information, Inc.)
"Review" by , "Allison's infectious enthusiasm for both the African bush and his job showing its wonders to tourists is readily apparent, making for a fast and very entertaining read."
"Synopsis" by ,
A hilarious, highly original collection of essays based on the Botswana truism: “only food runs!” With a new introduction and new material from the author
"Synopsis" by ,
Welcome to the African bush, where the animals are fierce, the tourists can be wild, and only the food runs!
 
Whatever You Do, Dont Run is a hilarious collection of true tales from top ­safari guide Peter Allison. In a place where the wrong behavior could get you eaten, Allison has survived face-to-face encounters with big cats, angry ­elephants, and the worlds most unpredictable animals—herds of untamed tourists and foolhardy guides whose outrageous antics sometimes make them even more dangerous than a pride of hungry lions!

Join Allison as he faces down charging lions—twice; searches for a drunk, half-naked tourist who happens to be a member of the British royal family; drives a Land Rover full of tourists into a lagoon full of hippos; and adopts the most ­vicious animal in Africa as his “pet.” Full of lively humor and a genuine love and respect for Botswana and its rich wildlife, Whatever You Do, Dont Run takes you to where the wild things are and introduces you to a place where every day is a new adventure!

"Synopsis" by , A hilarious, highly original collection of essays based on the Botswana truism: only food runs! Allison presents the guides-eye view of living in the bush, confronting the worlds fiercest terrain of wild animals, and managing herds of gaping tourists.
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