Dear Catastrophe Waitress

Mark thinks he has found The One in college. When Raquel abruptly takes off for Los Angeles to become a rock star, Mark tries to be happy for her–until ROCK-Ls first single sweeps the airwaves–a song about Marks stamina entitled “Two Minute Man.” And Marks life is never the same again.

Philippa doesnt really think twice about cheating on her punk rocker boyfriend, Trevor. After all, shes going to break up with him anyway. He mooches off her, treats her badly, and writes stupid songs about her breasts. Then Trevors band makes a splash with its one and only song sensation, “Philippa Cheats.” And suddenly Philippa is the most infamous ex-girlfriend in all of London.

Thus Philippa and Mark find themselves adrift, both single and living in Boston, still reeling from the impact that three minutes of music had on their lives. When these two minor-key souls meet and form a major chord, they will have to overcome the sneaking suspicion that each will betray the other . . . possibly with a song.

“Brendan Halpin adds weight to his funny moments and lightness to his sad ones . . . [reminding] us that comedy and tragedy arent opposites at all.”

–Carolyn Parkhurst, author of The Dogs of Babel, on Donorboy

“The authors greatest gift: his pitch-perfect ear for dialogue.”

–People, on Long Way Back

"Vindictive songs change the course of two people's lives in Halpin's third novel (after Long Way Back), a funny and unlikely story about mending broken hearts. Philippa Strange, a fresh-out-of-high-school punk rock girl, divides her time between an alcoholic mother in Cincinnati and a rocker boyfriend in London and becomes unfortunately notorious after her boyfriend immortalizes her cheating ways — and her name — in a popular song. Meanwhile, shortly after Mark Norris finishes college in Philadelphia, he finds himself the victim of 'premature ejaculation libel' when his ex-girlfriend cracks the Top 40 with her hit song, 'Two Minute Man.' Mark stumbles his way though toxic relationships as a pregnant Philippa, back in the States for good, fakes her death and assumes a new identity to escape from a violent boyfriend. Oddly, Mark's bumbling early adulthood is more engaging to read about than Philippa's flight, and though it's a given that the two will end up together, Halpin's assured prose and knack for mischievously comic turns ensure a smooth ride into happily ever after." Publishers Weekly (Copyright Reed Business Information, Inc.)

Philippa's Brit rocker boyfriend hits the big time with a song about how she cheated on him and Mark's ex-girlfriend becomes a rock sensation singing about his sexual inadequacies. This is the story of two minor-key lives who meet, fall in love, and complete each other.