Passionate, artistic and sensitive, Jolene Siana lived on the impoverished side of the tracks in Toledo, Ohio, with an alcoholic and abusive single mother. At a time when Reagan and heavy metal ruled the Midwest, Jolene's only comfort was found through writing, drawing and immersing herself in a growing post-punk/industrial music scene. A tailspin of suicidal depression and self-injury led her to write Ogre, the frontman for the band Skinny Puppy. He soon began to receive a flood of illustrated letters and journals filled with Jolene's most intimate thoughts.

At a concert, Ogre told Jolene that he saved all her letters and one day would return them. Nine years later, two boxes from Ogre arrived at Jolene's door. Re-examining the documents of her youth was a revelation. She realized that expressing herself through these letters had saved her life.

Go Ask Ogre reveals the truth about growing up weird in the 1980s, offering an inspiring update to the traditional teen cautionary tale-this time, a happy ending.

Ogre,

I almost killed myself.

I cut my wrists. I can't take this anymore.

I came home from school to find that my mother scattered my belongings in my room. Why? Because she's sick! She went on about how I'm no good, stupid, etc, and that she wants me out. She started hitting me so I went into my room and shut my door but she opened it and continued to hit me.

I started to go crazy. She left my room and I just startedcrying and couldn't stop. I found my razor blades. I cut my wrist just enough for it to bleed. I wanted to be able to dig the blade into my arm but I kept crying. I wanted to die so badly. I wanted to bleed. I needed someone. I went to meet Anthony but I missed him so I walked around looking insane. I could smell the flowers at my funeral but I couldn't see anyone.

If you think I'm trying to get you to write back by telling you about my attempt of suicide you're mistaken. I need to let my feelings out. You're the one I'm telling. You're the one I trust.

Critical Praise

By turns fierce, funny, heartbreaking and wise, Jolene Siana's Go Ask Ogre burns onto the page in an intense collage of words and images that together create a portrait of a gifted young woman fighting to hang on to her own life and choosing an unlikely-but strangely suitable-ally for her battle.-Caroline Kettlewell, Author of Skin Game

Cringingly confessional, persistently desperate, yet often uproariously funny an overdue riposte to the bludgeoning morality of the fabricated Go Ask Alice.-Doug Harvey, LA Weekly

Amidst the cultural and political corruption of the late 1980s, seeking and artistic teens like Jolene Siana found cathartic solace in aggressive and so-called 'morbid' bands like Skinny Puppy. That she persevered with the help of music that parents, preachers, and politicians condemned, but rarely tried to understand, is a moving lesson.-Alan Rapp, Editor of The Journey is the Destination: The Journals of Dan Eldon and Dan Eldon: The Art of Life

Jolene Siana courageously chronicles her own battle with depression as a 'cutter' in this stunning view into the world of an adolescentsuffering with a misunderstood illness. Her story will help others like herself and their families and save lives.-Andy Behrman, Author of Electroboy: A Memoir of Mania

Go Ask Ogrepeers into the world of a misfit "cutter" who lives with an abusive mother in the rust belt. A tailspin of suicidal depression and self-injury leads her to write Ogre, front man for the industrial rock band Skinny Puppy. Soon he receives a flood of elaborately illustrated letters and journals filled with Jolene's most intimate thoughts-from her most painful secrets to hilarious observations and lucid realizations about her life and those around her.

At a concert, Ogre confides to Jolene that he has saved all her letters. Nine years later, a box from Ogre arrives at Jolene's door. Re-examining the documents, she realizes that writing these letters had saved her life.

Go Ask Ogrecompiles Jolene Siana's actual letters, artwork, illustrations, and ephemera into a unique and powerful story of an extremely troubled teen who made it through the worst years of her life, and, through the power of music and art, transformed herself in the process. It is heavily illustrated and full color throughout.

Critical Praise:

"Pure, lucid and engaging...more authentic for a new generation of young women than, say, the 1971 cautionary tale about drugs, Go Ask Alice."-Susan Carpenter, LA Times

"Dark, funny and touching..."-boingboing.net

"Cringingly confessional, persistently desperate, yet often uproariously funny. All rendered and packaged in labor-intensive psychedelic outsider graphic design. An overdue riposte to the bludgeoning morality of the fabricated Go Ask Alice."-Doug Harvey, LA Weekly

"By turns fierce, funny, heartbreaking and wise, Jolene Siana's Go Ask Ogreburns onto the page in an intense collage of words and images that together create a portrait of a gifted young woman fighting to hang on to her own life and choosing an unlikely-but strangely suitable-ally for her battle."-Caroline Kettlewell, author of Skin Game

"Amidst the cultural and political corruption of the late 1980s, seeking and artistic teens like Jolene Siana found cathartic solace in aggressive and so-called 'morbid'bands like Skinny Puppy. That she persevered with the help of music that parents, preachers, and politicians condemned, but rarely tried to understand, is a moving lesson."-Alan Rapp, editor of The Journey is the Destination: The Journals of Dan Eldonand Dan Eldon: The Art of Life

Passionate, artistic and sensitive, Jolene Siana lived on the impoverished side of the tracks in Toledo, Ohio, with an alcoholic and abusive single mother. At a time when Reagan and heavy metal ruled the Midwest, Jolene's only comfort was found through writing, drawing and immersing herself in a growing post-punk/industrial music scene. A tailspin of suicidal depression and self-injury led her to write Ogre, the frontman for the band Skinny Puppy. He soon began to receive a flood of illustrated letters and journals filled with Jolene's most intimate thoughts.

At a concert, Ogre told Jolene that he saved all her letters and one day would return them. Nine years later, two boxes from Ogre arrived at Jolene's door. Re-examining the documents of her youth was a revelation. She realized that expressing herself through these letters had saved her life.

Go Ask Ogre reveals the truth about growing up weird in the 1980s, offering an inspiring update to the traditional teen cautionary tale-this time, a happy ending.

Ogre,

I almost killed myself.

I cut my wrists. I can't take this anymore.

I came home from school to find that my mother scattered my belongings in my room. Why? Because she's sick! She went on about how I'm no good, stupid, etc, and that she wants me out. She started hitting me so I went into my room and shut my door but she opened it and continued to hit me.

I started to go crazy. She left my room and I just startedcrying and couldn't stop. I found my razor blades. I cut my wrist just enough for it to bleed. I wanted to be able to dig the blade into my arm but I kept crying. I wanted to die so badly. I wanted to bleed. I needed someone. I went to meet Anthony but I missed him so I walked around looking insane. I could smell the flowers at my funeral but I couldn't see anyone.

If you think I'm trying to get you to write back by telling you about my attempt of suicide you're mistaken. I need to let my feelings out. You're the one I'm telling. You're the one I trust.