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Befriending Your Ex After Divorce: Making Life Better for You, Your Kids, And, Yes, Your Exby Judith Ruskay Rabinor
Synopses & Reviews
If you are divorced, or are contemplating divorce, you’ve probably heard the diatribe: Divorce is messy. Divorce is a tragedy. Divorce will scar your children for life.
Befriending Your Ex challenges many of these destructive myths about divorce, and sets out to change the way we think about the process of divorce and its ultimate outcome. While divorce certainly can have negative effects upon children, when they occur, these effects are likely to result from a hostile and combative relationship between ex-spouses. This uplifting book reminds the reader that all divorces need not follow this unhappy script, and that ex-spouses can collaboratively co-parent and be a source of support, not only to their children, but to one another as well.
Author Judy Rabinor’s ability to write as both a divorcee and a psychologist gives her a unique perspective on the subject, and in the book she artfully and thoughtfully combines research, clinical practice, and the everyday reality faced by a divorced parent. As a guide for parents, this book is filled with practical exercises, suggestions and strategies for coping with anger, grief, and loss, as well as the myriad of day to day issues involved in co-parenting after divorce.
Story after story—including Judy’s own story—reminds the reader that once the emotional tsunami of divorce settles back down, exes can be connected and supportive to one another as they share a major joy: loving and raising children and grandchildren, enjoying the family they have created, and creating a new family unit to evolve in the wake of divorce.
Befriending Your Ex After Divorce presents communication strategies, anger management tips, and other advice for building and maintaining friendship and a positive coparenting relationship with an ex after divorce.
The negative effect that divorce has on kids is most often not the result of the divorce itself, but the negative, hostile, and combative nature of the parents’ relationship. Not all divorces need to follow this unhappy script, but all too many do. Befriending Your Ex After Divorce is the guide divorced parents really need to develop a healthy post-divorce relationship with their ex-spouses. It features effective techniques for making peace with an ex-spouse for the sake of the entire family.
This book shows readers that it’s both possible and desirable to have a positive, platonic relationship with an ex-spouse long over the dissolution of a marriage. This type of post-divorce relationship is becoming more and more common and benefits everyone involved. The parents are able to cooperate in raising children, and both parents are able to offer each other support in the wake of divorce. The true stories and practical suggestions in this book show how ex-spouses can become supportive allies and partners through the ups and downs of parenting.
About the Author
Judith Ruskay Rabinor, PhD, is author of A Starving Madness and founder and director of the American Eating Disorders Center of Long Island. Divorced over twenty-five years ago, Rabinor has since remarried and has successfully co-parented her two grown children.
Foreword writer Don-David Lusterman, PhD, is a licensed psychologist in private practice in Baldwin, NY, and author of Infidelity: A Survival Guide.
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