The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

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Jennmarie68, March 8, 2012 (view all comments by Jennmarie68)
I was recommended this book a while ago while I was deep in depression and thought my relationship was on the outs. I didn't get a chance to read this book then, and I can say that I would have made things quite easier for me. I'm past all that now, but it was still a great book to read and gave me some great insight into myself and my relationship.

The five love languages are basically 5 ways that people express and understand love. The way Mr. Chapman describes it (and what really made the concept click for me) is that it's just like speaking language. If you're raised in a home that speaks English you learn English and that is your primary language. You can learn to speak another language, but you'll be most fluent in your primary language. The love languages are the same way.

Understanding the different languages is really quite simple. The explanation behind the different languages is very easy to understand. As soon as I'd read about one of the languages I would associate that language to someone I know. Having a "real-life" example for each language helped me understand that language a little bit better. It was easy for me to pinpoint other people's languages but it's been a bit harder for me to pinpoint my own language.... There is a section in the book that helps you figure out your own, and after reading it I've narrowed mine down to three. But before that sections I was thinking well I am all of those. But really we're only one, sometimes two. So I just need to pay attention a little bit more to what I feel and I should have it figured out fairly soon. And if you're not like me - and can't figure out the language for the people in your life- there is also a section to help you figure out what language other people are.

This book specifically deals with the love language of couples, but I think this concept is beneficial for any relationship - siblings, friends, parents, children. And since there is a whole series of these books I don't think I'm too far off in my thinking...

What I liked the most about this book is that for each language there was a story that gave an example of that language. Chapman would introduce us to a couple, tell us what their problem(s), and then tell us what their love languages were. He also gives examples for each language of how to show love to another person using that language.

This was very well written book. I wish I would have picked it up earlier, as it could have made a very difficult part of my life a little bit easier. But even though things were going good for me and my boyfriend (who is now my fiancee) when I read this it still gave me some insight into why we do (or don't do) certain things. It also helped me in communicating what I need and want in my relationship. So this book isn't just for relationships that are failing, but if yours is I would recommend reading this. This book (and I'm sure the entire series) can help you better understand the relationships you have with eveyone that you love.

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meredith1105, January 1, 2010 (view all comments by meredith1105)
This book changed my life. I went from feeling like there was something wrong with me because of my need for affection, to knowing that I am okay and I need to make sure my needs are met for me to be a healthy person. I have been able to re-evaluate my relationships with my parents and siblings in a new non-threatening way. My relationships with my love, my children and even my friends have all changed for the better. This book is easy to read, and so pertinent to us all. It is a must read!

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lanani808, December 7, 2009 (view all comments by lanani808)
Reading this book probably saved my relationship. It also gave me great insight into the difference between what I think I need from others and what I truly need. Dr. Chapman shares some very realistic situations to get his points across, and explains the love languages very clearly. It's not necessary to go through the whole class with this book, as I didn't, but it got me interested enough to subscribe to his weekly newsletter.

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Product Details

ISBN:

9781881273158

Subtitle:

How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

Author:

Chapman, Gary

Author:

Chapman, Gary D.

Publisher:

Northfield Publishing

Location:

Chicago :

Subject:

General

Subject:

Interpersonal Relations

Subject:

Marriage

Subject:

History & Criticism *

Subject:

Love

Subject:

Foreign

Subject:

Love & Romance

Subject:

Interpersonal communication

Subject:

Communication in marriage

Subject:

Love in literature

Subject:

REL012050

Copyright:

1995

Edition Number:

New ed..

Edition Description:

Trade Paper

Series Volume:

vol. 146.

Publication Date:

19921013

Binding:

Paperback

Language:

English

Illustrations:

Yes

Pages:

208

Dimensions:

9 x 6 x 0.5 in 0.63 lb