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Don't Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with Your Adult Children

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Don't Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with Your Adult Children Cover

 

Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

Parents make enormous sacrifices helping children become healthy and autonomous adults. And when children are older, popular wisdom advises parents to let go, disconnect, and bite their tongues. But increasing life spans mean that parents and children can spend as many as five or six decades as adults together: actively parenting adult children is a reality for many families.

Dr. Ruth Nemzoff--a leading expert in family dynamics--empowers parents to create close relationships with their adult children, while respecting their independence. Based on personal stories as well as advice that she has accrued from years of coaching, this lively and readable book shows parents how to

-communicate at long distances

-discuss financial issues without using money as a form of control

-speak up when disapproving of an adult childs partner or childrearing practices

-handle adult children's career choices or other midlife changes

-navigate an adult childs interreligious, interracial or same sex relationships

No other book treats the challenges of parent and adult offspring relationships as part and parcel of a healthy family dynamic. This practical guide will help parents play a vital and positive role in their children's lives.

 

10 Tips for Communicating with your Adult Children

Know the environment: Things aint what they used to be so make sure you know the realities of life today.

Know yourself:  What are your motives? Your child, brilliant psychologist that all children are, will assess your motives so you should, too.

Give up fantasy and deal with reality: You may want life and your children  to be perfect, but it isnt and they arent , so enjoy what you have.

Take the long view: Rome wasnt built in a day and neither will your children or grandchildren be fully mature in a day or even a year…

Expect the unexpected and be flexible enough to change plans.

Dont bite your tongue, but dont blurt out every thought you have.  Instead of using energy to squelch yourself, use that energy to figure out how to say what you want to say so it can be heard.

Be forgiving: We all make mistakes, all of us are rude sometimes or unintentionally hurtful. Forget holding a grudge!

Talk to your kids about money, yours and Thiers. So you both know what is available for future crises.

Dont play “go between”  between your kids or your kids and your spouse. Now that you are all adults, kids can and should create their own individual relationships with siblings and each parent.

Get a life! Now that your children are grown, share whatever wisdom or skills you have with someone. Make the world a better place.

Synopsis:

Parents make enormous sacrifices helping children become healthy and autonomous adults. And when children are older, popular wisdom advises parents to let go, disconnect, and bite their tongues. But increasing life spans mean that parents and children can spend as many as five or six decades as adults together: actively parenting adult children is a reality for many families.

Dr. Ruth Nemzoff--a leading expert in family dynamics--empowers parents to create close relationships with their adult children, while respecting their independence. Based on personal stories as well as advice that she has accrued from years of coaching, this lively and readable book shows parents how to

-communicate at long distances

-discuss financial issues without using money as a form of control

-speak up when disapproving of an adult child’s partner or childrearing practices

-handle adult children's career choices or other midlife changes

-navigate an adult child’s interreligious, interracial or same sex relationships

No other book treats the challenges of parent and adult offspring relationships as part and parcel of a healthy family dynamic. This practical guide will help parents play a vital and positive role in their children's lives.

About the Author

Dr. Ruth Nemzoff is a resident scholar at Brandeis University's Women's Studies Research Center and lectures widely on family dynamics. Her papers are archived at the Schlesinger Library at Harvard University where she also holds a doctorate in social policy.  She  has served three terms in the New Hampshire legislature and is the mother of four adult children.  She lives in Newton, MA with her husband Harris Berman.

Table of Contents

Introduction: Ambiguity

Don't Let Go, Don't Bite Your Tongue

Know Yourself

Say Goodbye to Fantasy and Welcome Reality

Emerging Adulthood

Refilling the Nest

Relationships

Weddings

Grandparenting

Money

Triangles

Communication Tips

Yours to Write

Product Details

ISBN:
9780230605183
Author:
Nemzoff, Ruth
Publisher:
Palgrave MacMillan
Preface by:
Barnett, Rosalind Chait
Preface:
Barnett, Rosalind Chait
Subject:
Parenting
Subject:
Parenting - Parent & Adult Child
Subject:
SEL031000
Subject:
Intergenerational relations
Subject:
Parent and adult child
Subject:
Personal Growth - General
Subject:
Family Relationships
Subject:
Parenting/Parent
Subject:
Adult Child
Subject:
Self Help-Family Issues
Edition Description:
Trade Paper
Publication Date:
20080831
Binding:
TRADE PAPER
Grade Level:
General/trade
Language:
English
Pages:
256
Dimensions:
8.29 x 5.46 x 0.69 in

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Related Subjects

Health and Self-Help » Self-Help » Family Issues
Health and Self-Help » Self-Help » General
Health and Self-Help » Self-Help » Relationships
History and Social Science » Politics » General

Don't Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with Your Adult Children New Trade Paper
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Product details 256 pages Palgrave MacMillan - English 9780230605183 Reviews:
"Synopsis" by ,
Parents make enormous sacrifices helping children become healthy and autonomous adults. And when children are older, popular wisdom advises parents to let go, disconnect, and bite their tongues. But increasing life spans mean that parents and children can spend as many as five or six decades as adults together: actively parenting adult children is a reality for many families.

Dr. Ruth Nemzoff--a leading expert in family dynamics--empowers parents to create close relationships with their adult children, while respecting their independence. Based on personal stories as well as advice that she has accrued from years of coaching, this lively and readable book shows parents how to

-communicate at long distances

-discuss financial issues without using money as a form of control

-speak up when disapproving of an adult child’s partner or childrearing practices

-handle adult children's career choices or other midlife changes

-navigate an adult child’s interreligious, interracial or same sex relationships

No other book treats the challenges of parent and adult offspring relationships as part and parcel of a healthy family dynamic. This practical guide will help parents play a vital and positive role in their children's lives.

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