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People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflictsby Robert Bolton
Synopses & Reviews
Improve your personal and professional relationships instantly with this timeless guide to communication, listening skills, body language, and conflict resolution.
A wall of silent resentment shuts you off from someone you love....You listen to an argument in which neither party seems to hear the other....Your mind drifts to other matters when people talk to you....
People Skills is a communication-skills handbook that can help you eliminate these and other communication problems. Author Robert Bolton describes the twelve most common communication barriers, showing how these "roadblocks" damage relationships by increasing defensiveness, aggressiveness, or dependency. He explains how to acquire the ability to listen, assert yourself, resolve conflicts, and work out problems with others. These are skills that will help you communicate calmly, even in stressful emotionally charged situations.
People Skills will show you:
• How to get your needs met using simple assertion techniques
• How body language often speaks louder than words
• How to use silence as a valuable communication tool
• How to de-escalate family disputes, lovers' quarrels, and other heated arguments
Both thought-provoking and practical, People Skills is filled with workable ideas that you can use to improve your communication in meaningful ways, every day.
Explores listening, assertion, and conflict management skills needed for the development of effective interpersonal communications and more meaningful human relationships, with an examination of barriers to communication.
Includes bibliographical references (p. 280-295) and index.
About the Author
Robert Bolton, Ph.D., is president of Ridge Consultants in Cazenovia, New York, a firm that specializes in improving human performance in industry, health care, education, and government. His staff has taught communication skills to thousands of managers, salespersons, first-line supervisors, secretaries, customer-relations personnel, teachers, members of the clergy, health-care workers, couples, and others.
Table of Contents
Skills for Bridging the Interpersonal Gap
Communication: Humanity's Supreme Achievement
Barriers to Communication
Common Communication Spoilers
Listening Is More Than Merely Hearing
The Importance of Listening
Four Skills of Reflective Listening
Reflective Responses Provide a Mirror to the Speaker
Why Reflective Responses Work
Style and Structure in Listening
Reading Body language
The Importance of Body Language
Improving Your Reflecting Skills
Guidelines for Improved Listening
Three Approaches to Relationships
Listening and Assertion: The Yin and Yang of Communication
Developing Three-Part Assertion Messages
Verbal Assertion: The Third Option
Handling the Push-Push Back Phenomenon
Increasing Your Assertive Options
Many Varieties of Assertive Behavior
Conflict Management Skills
Conflict Prevention and Control
Conflict Is Unavoidable
Handling the Emotional Components of Conflict
Focus on the Emotions First
Collaborative Problem Solving: Seeking an Elegant Solution
Three Kinds of Conflict
Three Essentials for Effective Communication
In Communication, Skills Alone Are Insufficient
Four Steps to Improved Communication
A Quantified Commitment to Use the Skills
What Our Readers Are Saying
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