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Nurtureshock: New Thinking about Children

by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman

Nurtureshock: New Thinking about Children Cover

Staff Pick

Though rarely would I refer to a parenting book as a "page turner," NurtureShock is just that fascinating. Bronson and Merryman call on neuroscience to show how conventional parenting wisdom often doesn't jive with the biological reality of a child's brain. If you want to learn the science behind how to best praise your child, or understand why teenage rebellion is a good thing, read this book.
Recommended by Rhonda, Powells.com

Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

In a world of modern, involved, caring parents, why are so many kids aggressive and cruel? Where is intelligence hidden in the brain, and why does that matter? Why do cross-racial friendships decrease in schools that are more integrated? If 98% of kids think lying is morally wrong, then why do 98% of kids lie? What's the single most important thing that helps infants learn language?

NurtureShock is a groundbreaking collaboration between award-winning science journalists Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. They argue that when it comes to children, we've mistaken good intentions for good ideas. With impeccable storytelling and razor-sharp analysis, they demonstrate that many of modern society's strategies for nurturing children are in fact backfiring — because key twists in the science have been overlooked.

Nothing like a parenting manual, the authors' work is an insightful exploration of themes and issues that transcend children's (and adults') lives.

Review:

"The central premise of this book by Bronson (What Should I Do with My Life?) and Merryman, a Washington Post journalist, is that many of modern society's most popular strategies for raising children are in fact backfiring because key points in the science of child development and behavior have been overlooked. Two errant assumptions are responsible for current distorted child-rearing habits, dysfunctional school programs and wrongheaded social policies: first, things work in children the same way they work in adults and, second, positive traits necessarily oppose and ward off negative behavior. These myths, and others, are addressed in 10 provocative chapters that cover such issues as the inverse power of praise (effort counts more than results); why insufficient sleep adversely affects kids' capacity to learn; why white parents don't talk about race; why kids lie; that evaluation methods for 'giftedness' and accompanying programs don't work; why siblings really fight (to get closer). Grownups who trust in 'old-fashioned' common-sense child-rearing — the definitely un-PC variety, with no negotiation or parent-child equality — will have less patience for this book than those who fear they lack innate parenting instincts. The chatty reportage and plentiful anecdotes belie the thorough research backing up numerous cited case studies, experts' findings and examination of successful progressive programs at work in schools. (Sept.)" Publishers Weekly (Copyright Reed Business Information, Inc.)

Review:

"A provocative collection of essays popularizing recent research that challenges conventional wisdom about raising children.... A skilled, accessible presentation of scientific research in layman's language." Kirkus Reviews

Review:

"NurtureShock is one of the most important books you will read this year. Bronson and Merryman move parenting out of the realm of folklore and into the realm of science — and reveal what decades of studies teach us about the complexities of raising, happy, healthy, self-motivated kids. As a writer, I was impressed by the prodigious research and keen analysis. As a father, I was consumed with taking notes and exhilarated by all I learned." Daniel H. Pink

Synopsis:

Award-winning science journalists Bronson and Merryman argue that when it comes to children, parents have mistaken good intentions for good ideas. The authors demonstrate that many of modern society's strategies for nurturing children are in fact backfiring.

Synopsis:

This groundbreaking collaboration between award-winning science journalists Bronson and Merryman demonstrates that many of modern society's strategies for nurturing children are, in fact, backfiring--because key twists in the science have been overlooked.

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What Our Readers Are Saying

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Average customer rating based on 3 comments:
lindsey beadle, October 17, 2009 (view all comments by lindsey beadle)
Really, one of the best nonfiction books I have read in a long time. I could barely put it down. Then I made the mistake of loaning it out when I hadn't finished the last chapter and my friend kept it awhile. Then my husband nabbed it the day I got it back. It is a good book! Very well written - easy and enjoyable to read. The subject matter is a nice wake up call to commonly held beliefs about kids. As a new mom I'm sure I will be referencing this book in the near future. If you have any interest in kids at all I'm pretty sure you'll find this book interesting and entertaining!
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Jonathan, October 11, 2009 (view all comments by Jonathan)
A truly surprising book about parenting, based on decades of scientific research rather than "instinct," which is shown again and again to be wrong. I haven't stopped talking about this book since I started reading it, and I strongly recommend it to anyone who has kids or works with kids.
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Book Dads, September 20, 2009 (view all comments by Book Dads)
What makes children act more aggressively – watching educational media like Arthur or violent media like Power Rangers? Is childhood obesity more correlated with playing video games or with getting less sleep? Does putting students in multiracial environments really make them less racially biased? Is it more effective to punish children for telling a lie or to reward them for telling the truth? These questions and others are addressed in NurtureShock, which presents the scientific research surrounding a number of issues about parenting our children and challenges us to look at them in a new way.

Bronson & Merryman are veteran science reporters, and it shows. The science here is fully and accurately portrayed, and they demonstrate that just as much can be learned from “failed” experiments as from those that yield an expected result. They also don’t hesitate to discuss areas in which findings are inconclusive or still heavily debated. Above all, they give priority to the actual experimental findings and then look at possible explanations, rather than simply advancing their own pet theories about parenting and children. As a result, this is a book that is long on demonstrable fact and short on preaching.

In addition to presenting the studies and their results in an easily comprehensible and accessible manner, Bronson & Merryman also put a human face on the scientists themselves. They present personal portrayals of many of the scientists involved in this research, and we journey with these researchers through their thought processes as they design experiments and then work to understand the results.

Almost all of the findings presented in NurtureShock are counter-intuitive, and Bronson and Merryman address this problem directly. They discuss not only why some of these findings seem to fly in the face of what we think we understand about children, but also relate their own challenges in trying to put these concepts into practice. One of the recurrent themes in NurtureShock is that by doing what we think is best for our children, we are often achieving the exact opposite result. For example, in the chapter on Why White Parents Don’t Talk About Race, Bronson & Ashley look at the practices of not making racial distinctions when talking to young children, and of placing them into multiracially diverse environments. Both practices are intended to reduce interracial bias in children and promote interracial friendship, but paradoxically have no effect or even a negative effect. It turns out that the period of young children’s lives when we assume children are not aware of race and therefore are not talking with them about it is the exact developmental period when they are noticing race and forming their first ideas about it. Similarly, simply being in a multiracial environment is not enough for children to draw their own conclusions about racial equality; improved attitudes about race only emerge when children are engaged directly in explicit teachings about racial issues.

NurtureShock surveys a wide and diverse range of topics in its ten chapters, from teaching babies how to talk, to the nature of teen rebellion. In examining issues like these, Bronson & Ashley uncover two common assumptions that hinder our understanding of child development. The first is that things work the same way for children as they do for adults, and the second is that good traits necessarily ward off and oppose negative behaviors in children. In examining these assumptions through numerous examples, NurtureShock will also challenge your own preconceived notions about parenting and children. This is a useful and eye-opening book, and one that illustrates how science and research can help us to better understand our children and our world. And if you change your approach to parenting based on even one of the ideas in this book, NurtureShock will help make you a better parent too.
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Product Details

ISBN:
9780446504126
Subtitle:
New Thinking about Children
Author:
Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman
Author:
Bronson, Po
Author:
Merryman, Ashley
Publisher:
Twelve
Subject:
Parenting
Subject:
Child rearing
Subject:
Child Development
Subject:
Developmental - Child
Subject:
Children's Studies
Publication Date:
September 2009
Binding:
Hardcover
Language:
English
Pages:
336
Dimensions:
9.14x6.34x1.14 in. 1.26 lbs.

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