The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead

The Zombie Survival Guide is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now. Fully illustrated and exhaustively comprehensive, this book covers everything you need to know, including how to understand zombie physiology and behavior, the most effective defense tactics and weaponry, ways to outfit your home for a long siege, and how to survive and adapt in any territory or terrain.

In the tradition of Bored of the Rings, O.J.'s Legal Pad, and The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook, this book is a dead-on parody of wilderness and survival manuals like the SAS guides that sell millions of copies, and it will appeal as much to readers of The Onion as it will to fans of science fiction novels and horror films. Max Brooks captures the tone of these publications with perfect pitch, lacing his life-or-death advice with sarcastic, ironic, and very funny comments about the relentless power and persistence of zombies and the vulnerability of ordinary humans.

An illustrated, comprehensive guide to surviving an attack by hordes of the predatory undead explains zombie physiology and behavior, the most effective weaponry and defense strategies, how to outfit one's home for a long siege, and how to survive in any territory or terrain. Original. 35,000 first printing.

The Zombie Survival Guide is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now. Fully illustrated and exhaustively comprehensive, this book covers everything you need to know, including how to understand zombie physiology and behavior, the most effective defense tactics and weaponry, ways to outfit your home for a long siege, and how to survive and adapt in any territory or terrain.

Top 10 Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack

1. Organize before they rise!

2. They feel no fear, why should you?

3. Use your head: cut off theirs.

4. Blades don’t need reloading.

5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair.

6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it.

7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.

8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!

9. No place is safe, only safer.

10. The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.

Don’t be carefree and foolish with your most precious asset—life. This book is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now without your even knowing it. The Zombie Survival Guide offers complete protection through trusted, proven tips for safeguarding yourself and your loved ones against the living dead. It is a book that can save your life.

MAX BROOKS lives in New York City but is ready to move to a more remote and defensible location at a moment’s notice.

THE UNDEAD: MYTHS AND REALITIES. Solanum: the virus — Zombie attributes — The voodoo zombie — The Hollywood zombie — Outbreaks — WEAPONS AND COMBAT TECHNIQUES. General rules — Close combat (bludgeons; edged weapons; hand weapons; power tools) — Slings & arrows — Firearms — Explosives — Fire — Other weapons — Armor — ON HE DEFENSE. The private residence (defending your home) — Public spaces (office buildings, schools, hospitals, shopping malls, churches, banks, etc.) — The Fortress (military complexes, prisons, offshore oil rigs) — ON THE RUN. Equipment — Vehicles — Terrain types (forest, plains, fields, hills, swamp, tundra, etc.) — Alternate means of transportation — ON THE ATTACK. Strategies (Lure and destroy, the barricade; the tower; mobile tower; the cage; the tank; the stampede; motorized sweep, etc.) — LIVING IN AN UNDEAD WORLD. Assemble a group — Study study study! — Wean yourself off luxury items — Remain vigilant — To the ends of the earth! — Know your location — Become an expert — Plan your route — Plan B-C-D-E! — List your gear, be ready to shop — Construct defenses — Plan an escape route — Be on guard — Remain concealed — Remain isolated — Duration — Then what? — RECORDED ATTACKS [THROUGHOUT HISTORY.]