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Who Moved My Mouse?: A Self-Help Book for Cats (Who Don't Need Any Help)by Dena Harris
Synopses & Reviews
While cats may hide their self-doubt behind dismissive “you bore me” and “I just sprayed the couch” smirks, underneath they are desperate to introduce meaning into their nine lives. This parody, based on classic self-help texts, has the answers.
Has your cat been moping around in that patch of sunlight for more than 23 hours a day? Has kitty been overindulging in Fancy Feast in order to fill the vast emptiness within? While humans have plenty of self-help books to aid us in times of existential crisis, our feline friends have had to go it alone. Until now. This personal-growth book for cats (and their humans) uses the framework of classic self-help tomes to shed light on universal kitty questions. With chapters like “A Cat’s Conversations with God” and “The Fur Agreements,” this guide will empower cats to make the 20 minutes they’re awake each day the best 20 minutes of their lives.
Has kitty been overindulging in catnip to fill the vast emptiness within? Does self-actualization always remain one whisker away? This indispensable guide, based on classic self-help texts and filled with quizzes, exercises, and insider tips, will teach cats to make small, daily changes (e.g. Become an Early Riser—and Force Others to Join You) to improve their lives. With chapters like “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff . . . But Feel Free to Freak Out Over Anything That Moves Suddenly or Without Warning” and answers to pressing existential questions such as “Where are you going with that ham?,” this manual empowers cats to make the twenty minutes they’re awake each day the best twenty minutes of their lives.
"This self-help guide will empower cats to make the 20 minutes they're awake each day the best 20 minutes of their lives"--Provided by publisher.
About the Author
DENA HARRIS has been a humor columnist for Cats & Kittens magazine and contributor to Chicken Soup for the Cat-Lover’s Soul. The author of Lessons in Stalking and For the Love of Cats, Dena lives in Madison, North Carolina.
Table of Contents
A Cat’s Conversations with God 1
Purrsonality Profile 13
How to Win Friends and Influence Dog People 33
Who Moved My Mouse? An Amazing Path to Declare Revenge on Those Who Dare Disturb What Is Yours 43
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff . . . But Feel Free to Freak Out Over Anything That Moves Suddenly or Without Warning 59
Nice Cats Don’t Get the Corner Litter Box 73
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Cats 95
The Fur Agreements 105
A Cat’s Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook 115
The Secret 131
About the Author133
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