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Getting More: How to Negotiate to Achieve Your Goals in the Real Worldby Stuart Diamond
Synopses & Reviews
This new model of human interaction has been chosen by Google to train the entire company worldwide (30,000 employees), is the #1 book for your career chosen by The Wall Street Journal’s website, and is labeled “phenomenal” by Lawyers’ Weekly and “brilliant” by Liza Oz of the Oprah network.
Based on more than 20 years of research and practice among 30,000 people in 45 countries, Getting More concludes that finding and valuing the other party’s emotions and perceptions creates far more value than the conventional wisdom of power and logic. It is intended to provide better agreements for everyone no matter what they negotiate – from jobs to kids to billion dollar deals to shopping.
The book, a New York Times bestseller and #1 Wall Street Journal business best seller, is based on Professor Stuart Diamond’s award-winning course at the Wharton Business School, where the course has been the most popular over 13 years. It challenges the conventional wisdom on every page, from “win-win” to BATNA to rationality to the use of power. Companies have made billions of dollars so far using his new model and parents have gotten their 4-year-olds to willingly brush their teeth and go to bed.
Prof. Diamond draws from his experience as a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist at The New York Times, Harvard-trained attorney, Wharton MBA, U.N. Consultant in many countries and manager and executive in many sectors, including technology, agriculture, medical services, finance, energy and aviation. “The ROI from reading Getting More will make it the best investment you make this year,” says Rhys Dekle, the business development head of the Microsoft Games division, which produces X-Box. He added that the book was his team’s best investment of the year too. The model was also used to quickly solve the 2008 Hollywood Writer’s Strike.
The advice is addressed through the insightful stories of more than 400 people who have used Prof. Diamond’s tools with great success: A 20% savings on an item already on sale. An extra $300 million profit in a business. A woman from India getting out of her own arranged marriage. Better relationships with the family, including teenagers. Raises at work. Better jobs. Dealing with emotional situations. Meeting one’s goals. Finding better things to trade. Solving cultural and political problems, sports conflicts, and ordinary arguments.
The book is intended to be used in any situation. The most common response is “life changing”, beginning on page one. “The most inspirational book I have read this year” said David Simon, an attorney in San Francisco, CA. “This book can change the world,” says Craig Silverman, Investment Advisor, Long Island, NY
Book News Annotation:
Diamond, a negotiation specialist, advisor, attorney, and former journalist, draws on the stories of students in his course at the Wharton School as well as his experiences working with government and corporate leaders, lawyers, laborers, and everyday people from around the world to explain how to improve dealings with others in any situation. He describes how conventional concepts of rationality, power, walking out, and "win-win" don't work in negotiation, and details 12 strategies from his course that are related to emotional sensitivity, relationships, clear goals, being incremental, and viewing each situation as different. Annotation ©2011 Book News, Inc., Portland, OR (booknews.com)
A former Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter for the New York Times, Diamond (Law/Univ. of Pennsylvania) debuts with a superb how-to based on his immensely popular course on negotiation. The author prepares for any negotiation by asking himself, “What are my goals? Who are ‘they’? What will it take to persuade them?” Depending on the answers, he then draws selectively on bargaining tools and strategies described in this anecdote-rich book. Others in his field assume that most people in a negotiation are rational. Not so, says Diamond. People in the real world—whether friends, store clerks or CEOs—tend to be emotional and irrational in their interactions. Since the People involved make up 90 percent of a negotiation (substance accounts for only 10 percent), you must negotiate based on your understanding of “the pictures in the head of the other party”—a phrase Diamond frequently uses to underscore that psychology trumps the issues at the bargaining table. Successful negotiators must prepare, learn what makes others tick (through research and small talk), take small steps, communicate clearly, turn problems into opportunities, avoid deceit and embrace differences. Above all, writes the author, they must stay focused on specific goals and connect with the other party. Many of Diamond’s suggestions are counterintuitive…This immensely useful book will have wide appeal and leave many readers anxious to put their new skills to work.
World renowned negotiator and Wharton Professor Stuart Diamond believes that the negotiation seems to have succumbed to the dogma of win-win. But win-win--and in fact any rigid stance to negotiation--is flawed. Sometimes, the point is to lose--in order to gain what you want another time. Sometimes it pays to trade favors of unequal value--not everything is about dollars and cents. The point is to define your goals, and meet them--whatever those goals are.
As Diamond makes clear, negotiation is a part of life--it is the basic process of interaction. And most of us are terrible at it. Negotiation experts tell people negotiations should be, or can be, rational. Bunk! People get scared, angry, vengeful, fearful and irrational. That is how real life plays out. You have to be able to deal with the unpredictable.
In a book that shows how negotiation plays out in the real world, Stuart Diamond offers a powerful toolkit on how to get more in any situation. He talks about being incremental instead of going for the fences; about the fact that people are the single most important element in a negotiation. Miscommunication, he says, is the biggest cause of a negotiation breakdown. He suggests a tool that can overcome even the hardest bargainer--using their own standards and policies against them. Diamond talks about intangible elements that can be traded off in a negotiation, how emotions can undermine the quality of any negotiation, and creative ways to break impasses. He looks at how we can negotiate better at work and in our careers, in our relationships with our kids, and in our everyday lives.
Negotiation is part of the fabric of our lives--we don't have the option of sitting on the sidelines, and letting others run roughshod over our careers and our lives. Stuart Diamond shows us how to achieve what we want--how to get more--whether we are negotiating the cost of a new car with a dealership, or negotiating with a troublesome teen over his or her homework.
About the Author
STUART DIAMOND is one of the world's foremost experts and teachers on negotiation. He advises 200 of the Fortune 500 companies and firms in the country, from Microsoft and IBM to Amazon and Sprint. His course on negotiation has been rated the most popular at Wharton for the last ten years. A former associate director of the Harvard Negotiation Project at the Harvard Law School, he is currently president of Global Strategy Group. He holds a JD from Harvard Law School and an MBA from Wharton. In a previous life, Diamond was a Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter for the New York Times, where in the 1980s he wrote over 90 front-page stories. He has appeared on Today and Good Morning America.
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