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Mike and Mike's Rules for Sports and Lifeby Mike Greenberg
Synopses & Reviews
Every morning more than three million listeners tune in to Mike and Mike in the Morning on ESPN Radio—mostly to hear the Mikes’ (Golic and Greenberg) riotous back-and-forth on everything from why baseball managers should dress like real people to how to lose a fight with the wife with dignity. In Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life, the beloved mic jockeys put their unique stamp on, well, the rules for sports and life. In years on the road, in the studio, and at home, Greeny and Golic have learned that it’s all about the big stuff: separating order from chaos, ensuring our survival as a species, and keeping peace. For instance:
• The Fourth of July should be eliminated and replaced with an Independence Day that falls on the first Thursday of the month, creating a four-day weekend like Thanksgiving, which, by the way, could do without the Detroit Lions.
• “The Human Element” in sports officiating and weather forecasting sucks.
• The top pick in the NBA draft lottery should go to the team that came closest to making the playoffs—not to the team that rips off fans by mailing it in after the All-Star break.
• When someone says, “I’m being completely honest,” they might as well be claiming that they go to Hooters just for the wings.
• Kids do not get to eat french fries for breakfast. Ever. And who cares what the kids at the next table are ordering.
• No more designated hitter!
If you’re one of Golic and Greeny’s legions of followers, you probably can’t get enough of this sort of provocative, hilarious, and occasionally obsessive stuff. And if you’re one of those fans who live by the rule “There oughta be a rule,” then Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life is the book for you.
ESPN's star comedic duo--ex-jock Golic and self-described girly man Greenberg--bring their radio and TV sports shtick to the page with this hilarious collection of rules to live by.
Learn the secret of juju from Hart Seely, a man who wins games for the New York Yankees in his living room by harnessing juju energy, in this hilarious, unforgettable fan confessional from an award-winning humorist.
From an award-winning humorist, a touching memoir and manifesto that reveals the deep secrets of fan jinxes, hexes, and charms
Did you know there is a secret to winning ballgames? Its not the players, managers, money, or luck. Its juju, and no one knows it better than Hart Seely. Seely has spent a lifetime practicing the art of juju from his living room. And winning ballgames for the New York Yankees. He paces floors. He yells at defenseless TVs. He rallies the team like Churchill addressing the collective British soul. But what he is really doing is harnessing juju energy to influence the outcome of games. And it works.
In this uproarious, unforgettable fan confessional, Seely shares the basics of juju for the beginner—“Setting the Table,” asking for a called strike instead of a walk-off homer—to advanced juju—“Bringing the Neg,” predicting bad events to keep them from actually happening—to the deepest, darkest formulas of this age-old art. Along the way readers come to know Hart and his hilarious band of fellow juju practitioners, a secret club of friends whose fandom bonds them across decades, not to mention won/loss columns.
Nostalgic, heartwarming, and laugh-out-loud funny, The Juju Rules is a memoir of a life well-lived in service to ones team that shows how love can be a powerful passion in the best way.
About the Author
Mike Greenberg is the New York Times bestselling author of Why My Wife Thinks I’m an Idiot and was host of the ABC TV game show Duel. He lives outside New York City with his wife and two children.
Mike Golic is a graduate of Notre Dame and a nine-year NFL veteran, having played defensive tackle for the Houston Oilers, Philadelphia Eagles, and Miami Dolphins. He is married with three children.
Did we mention they host Mike and Mike in the Morning on ESPN Radio?
Table of Contents
Prologue: When Ari Met Seely xi
Opening Day 1
Off the Wall 10
Swept Away 17
The Dice of God 24
Bobby, Mickey, and the Duke 30
The Two-Second Threshold 37
Rudy May Not 47
Yankee Love 55
The Yankee Crier 69
The Hoosier Show Lounge Massacre 79
George Brett 98
The Ultimate Yankee Fan 108
Damned Fool 117
New Hampshire 132
Touching the Stone 140
The Knot 160
“George Steinbrenner Must Die” 170
Frank Crosetti 180
The Trip 193
The Rizzutonic Verses 202
Yankee Incentive Rewards 218
Bringing the Neg 227
Epilogue: The Yard 267
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