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Screamfree Parenting: The Revolutionary Approach to Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Coolby Hal Edward Runkel
Synopses & Reviews
You Can Start a Revolution in Your Family . . . Tonight
ScreamFree Parenting is not just about lowering your voice. It’s about learning to calm your emotional reactions and learning to focus on your own behavior more than your kids’ behavior . . . for their benefit. Our biggest enemy as parents is not the TV, the Internet, or even drugs. Our biggest enemy is our own emotional reactivity. When we say we “lost it” with our kids, the “it” in that sentence is our own adulthood. And then we wonder why our kids have so little respect for us, why our kids seem to have all the power in the family.
It’s time to do it differently. And you can. You can start to create and enjoy the types of calm, mutually respectful, and loving relationships with your kids that you’ve always craved. You can begin to revolutionize your family, starting tonight.
Parenting is not about kids, it’s about parents.
If you’re not in control, then you cannot be in charge.
What every kid really needs are parents who are able to keep their cool no matter what.
Easier said than done? Not anymore, thanks to ScreamFree Parenting, the principle-based approach that’s inspiring parents everywhere to truly revolutionize their family dynamics. Moving beyond the child-centered, technique-based approaches that ultimately fail, the ScreamFree way compels you to:
focus on yourself
calm yourself down, and
grow yourself up
By staying calm and connected with your kids, you begin to operate less out of your deepest fears and more out of your highest principles, revolutionizing your relationships in the process.
ScreamFree Parenting is not just another parenting book. It’s the first parenting
book that maintains—from beginning to end—that parenting is NOT about kids . . . it’s about parents. As parents pay more attention to controlling their own behavior instead of their kids’ behavior, the result is stronger, more rewarding, and more fulfilling family relationships.
For those of you reading who are parents, know parents, or have had parents, the notion that the greatest thing you can do for your children is to learn to focus on yourself may sound strange, even heretical. It’s not. Here’s why: we are the only ones we can control. We cannot control our kids—we cannot control the behavior of any other human being. And yet, so many “experts” keep giving us more tools (“techniques”) to help us try to do just that. And, of course, the more we try to control, the more out of control our children become.
“Don’t make me come up there.” “Don’t make me pull this car over.” “How many times do I have to tell you?” Even our language suggests that our kids have control over us.
It’s no wonder that we end up screaming. Or shutting down. Or simply giving up. And the charts, refrigerator magnets, family meetings, and other techniques in most typical parenting books just don’t work. They end up making us feel more frustrated and more powerless in this whole parenting thing.
This practical, effective guide for parents of all ages with kids of all ages introduces proven principles for overcoming the anxieties and stresses of parenting and setting new patterns of connection and cooperation. Well-written in an engaging, conversational tone, the book is sensible, straightforward, and based on the experiences of hundreds of actual families. It will help all parents become calming authorities in their homes, bring peace to their families today, and give kids what they need to grow into caring, self-directed adults tomorrow.
A family therapist introduces a practical, effective approach to parenting that explains how to overcome the stresses and anxieties of parenting by learning how to relate to children in a calm, cool, and connected way, emphasizing the need for privacy for every member of the family, how to respect a child's choices and opinions, and how to set new patterns of cooperation and connection. 125,000 first printing.
Introduces a practical approach to parenting that explains how to overcome the stresses and anxieties of parenting by learning how to relate to children in a calm, cool, and connected way.
About the Author
HAL EDWARD RUNKEL is a licensed marriage and family therapist,relationship
coach, and internationalspeaker. He is founder and presidentof ScreamFree
Living, Inc.—dedicated to calming the world one relationship at a time. Hal’s principles
have already helped thousandsof familiesrevolutionize their relationships. He lives
with his wife,Jenny, andtheir twochildrenjust outsideAtlanta, Georgia.
Table of Contents
Parenting is not about kids, it's about parents — If you're not under control, then you cannot be in charge — Growing up is hard to do, especially for grown-ups storytime — Begin with the end in mind, but let go of the final results — Kids need their room — Resistance is futile : practice judo parenting — You are not a prophet (and neither is grandma) — Parents set the table by setting the tone (and vice versa) — Let the consequences do the screaming — Empty threats are really broken promises (and other truths about consequences) — Put on your own oxygen mask first — Revolutionary relationships.
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