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The De-Textbook: The Stuff You Didn't Know about the Stuff You Thought You Knew

by

The De-Textbook: The Stuff You Didn't Know about the Stuff You Thought You Knew Cover

 

Synopses & Reviews

Publisher Comments:

From the most-read humor site on the internet, Cracked.com

YOU MIGHT BE A ZOMBIEand#133;

and#160;

You're going to wish you never picked up this book.

Some facts are too terrifying to teach in school. Unfortunately, Cracked.com is more than happy to fill you in:

* A zombie apocalypse? It could happen. 50% of humans are infected with a parasite that can take over your brain.

* The FDA wouldn't let you eat bugs, right? Actually, you might want to put down those jelly beans. And that apple. And that strawberry yogurt.

* Think dolphins are our friends? Then these sex-crazed thrill killers of the sea have you right where they want you.

* The most important discovery in the history of genetics? Francis Crick came up with it while on LSD.

* Think you're going to choose whether or not to buy this book? Scientists say your brain secretly makes all your decisions 10 seconds before you even know what they are.

If youand#8217;re a fan of The Oatmeal or Frak.com and hate being wrong about stuff, youand#8217;ll love what you find in YOU MIGHT BE A ZOMBIE from the twisted minds at Cracked.

Synopsis:

From Apache creation myths and Christopher Columbusand#8217;s STD-ridden arrival on the shores of America, to Elvis, the Mole People, and Roswell, a humorous look at the seminal events and legends in US history. Inand#160;George Washington Is Cash Money, readers will learn the absolutely true stories of:
  • The UFO at Roswell was a weather balloon--patched up with floral-print scotch tape.
  • The Salem Witch trials happened because a couple of teens wanted attention.
  • Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks.
  • Elvis Presley watched up to three TVs at once, and changed channels by shooting them with guns.

Synopsis:

You are an idiot.

Don't get defensive! It's not your fault. For decades your teachers, authority figures and textbooks have been lying to you. You do not have five senses. Your tongue doesn't have neatly segregated taste-bud zones. You don't know what the pyramids really looked like. You're even pooping wrong - Jesus, you're a wreck!

But it's going to be okay. Because we're here to help. Packed with more sexy facts than the Encyclopedia Pornographica, the Cracked De-Textbook will teach you about the true stars of history, why you picture everything from Velociraptors to Ancient Rome incorrectly, and finally, at long last - how to pop a proper squat. This book was built from the ground up to systematically seek out, dismantle and destroy the many untruths that years of misguided education have left festering inside of you, and leave you a smarter person...whether you like it or not. The De-Textbook is a merciless, brutal learning machine. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are informed.

About the Author

Founded in 1958 as a print publication, Cracked.com has been published exclusively online since 2006. Jack OBrien, the sites editor in chief, lives in New York.

Product Details

ISBN:
9780452298200
Author:
Cracked
Publisher:
Plume Books
Author:
Cracked.Com
Author:
Cracked Com
Author:
Melville, Soren
Author:
O'Brien, Cory
Subject:
General Humor
Subject:
Parodies
Subject:
HUMOR / Parodies
Subject:
Essays
Edition Description:
Trade paper
Publication Date:
20131131
Binding:
Paperback
Grade Level:
from 12
Language:
English
Illustrations:
20 black-and-white line drawings
Pages:
224
Dimensions:
8 x 4.5 in 1 lb
Age Level:
from 18

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Related Subjects

Arts and Entertainment » Humor » General
Arts and Entertainment » Humor » Narrative
Arts and Entertainment » Humor » Parodies
Arts and Entertainment » Humor » Trivia
Featured Titles » Humor
Reference » General
Reference » Trivia

The De-Textbook: The Stuff You Didn't Know about the Stuff You Thought You Knew New Hardcover
0 stars - 0 reviews
$23.00 In Stock
Product details 224 pages Plume Books - English 9780452298200 Reviews:
"Synopsis" by ,
From Apache creation myths and Christopher Columbusand#8217;s STD-ridden arrival on the shores of America, to Elvis, the Mole People, and Roswell, a humorous look at the seminal events and legends in US history. Inand#160;George Washington Is Cash Money, readers will learn the absolutely true stories of:
  • The UFO at Roswell was a weather balloon--patched up with floral-print scotch tape.
  • The Salem Witch trials happened because a couple of teens wanted attention.
  • Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks.
  • Elvis Presley watched up to three TVs at once, and changed channels by shooting them with guns.
"Synopsis" by ,
You are an idiot.

Don't get defensive! It's not your fault. For decades your teachers, authority figures and textbooks have been lying to you. You do not have five senses. Your tongue doesn't have neatly segregated taste-bud zones. You don't know what the pyramids really looked like. You're even pooping wrong - Jesus, you're a wreck!

But it's going to be okay. Because we're here to help. Packed with more sexy facts than the Encyclopedia Pornographica, the Cracked De-Textbook will teach you about the true stars of history, why you picture everything from Velociraptors to Ancient Rome incorrectly, and finally, at long last - how to pop a proper squat. This book was built from the ground up to systematically seek out, dismantle and destroy the many untruths that years of misguided education have left festering inside of you, and leave you a smarter person...whether you like it or not. The De-Textbook is a merciless, brutal learning machine. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are informed.

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