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Original Essays | August 21, 2014

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My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish


My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish Cover







Yesterday my big brother, Mark, turned into a real-life actual EVIL SCIENTIST. I mean, he always was mostly evil anyway—you know, knocking me down things or over things, locking me in things or out of things, squashing me under things or between things, that kind of mostly evil stuff. But lately hes slid up the evil scale from “mostly evil” to “nearly totally evil.” It started with the way he talked.

“Hey! Tom!” he shouted. “Remote! Now!”

Mark spoke in short words, like his brain had shrunk or something. He grabbed the remote and kicked my foot away. “Moron,” he mumbled.

My best friend, Pradeep, who lives next door, says that “moron” is a big-brother word for little brothers. His brother, Sanj, whos also mostly evil, calls him that too. Luckily Sanj is away at boarding school though, so he can only be mostly evil to Pradeep during school vacations.

I told my mom about Mark going more evil, but Mom said its just that Mark is “home-moanal.” Which I think is why hes moaning at home a lot. She said he cant help acting evil (well, she didnt say evil exactly, but she should have). She said its because he has lots of “home-moans” racing around his body.

Just when I thought Mark couldnt get worse, Granny and Grandad got him a chemistry set for his birthday. It came in a huge box with big official writing on the front that read:

WARNING! Only for use by children over twelve years old. To be used solely under the supervision of adults.

While I was reading the box, Mark thwacked my head from behind.

“Dont touch this—got it?” he said.

I walked away rubbing my head. Mostly because it hurt, but also to get my head out of the way in case he decided to thwack me again.

He took out a white scientist coat and looked at all the stuff inside the box. There were bottles and test tubes and cups and little stirring things, all made of glass. Real breakable glass! Mom looked at the chemistry set and leaned over to me.

“Maybe you shouldnt touch it, dear. It looks like an accident waiting to happen,” she said.

Mark put on the coat and turned around. He folded up the collar, shoved his hands in the pockets and let a creepy smile spread over his face. And you know that squirmy, prickly feeling you get when you let a millipede crawl on your arm? I had that feeling, but in my stomach.

Mark had turned into an EVIL SCIENTIST. But I didnt know how evil he could be until he came home the next day with the goldfish.


Text copyright © 2013 by Mo OHara.
Illustrations copyright © 2013 by Marek Jagucki

Product Details

Ohara, Mo
Feiwel & Friends
O'Hara, Mo
Jagucki, Marek
Fantasy & Magic
Children s-Science Fiction and Fantasy
Children s Animals-Animal Stories-Fish
Children s humor
Humorous Stories
Animals - Pets
Edition Description:
Chapter Book
My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish
Series Volume:
Publication Date:
Grade Level:
from 2 up to 5
Black-and-white illustrations throughout
8.25 x 5.5 in 1 lb
Age Level:
from 7 up to 10

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Related Subjects

Children's » Animals » Fishes
Children's » General
Children's » Humor
Children's » Middle Readers » General
Children's » Middle Readers » New Arrivals
Children's » Middle Readers » Scary Stories
Children's » Scary Stories » General
Children's » Scary Stories » Monsters
Children's » Science Fiction and Fantasy » General
Children's » Science Fiction and Fantasy » Science Fiction

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