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Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism

Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism Cover

 

 

Excerpt

A Wacky Path for Politics

Memo: ELECTION 2000

Before I analyze the presidential election, I want to make a statement, on behalf of South Florida, to the state and local candidates who ran all those TV ads, especially Elaine Bloom, Clay Shaw, Bill McCollum and Bill Nelson: We hope that you and all your media advisers rot in Campaign Hell, Okay? We hope that demons tape your eyelids open and force you to watch your own TV commercials. We hope that every thousand years, the demons hold an election to decide which one of you should be allowed to leave Campaign Hell, and the winner is always: None of the Above.

There! I feel better! Now, let's analyze the presidential election. As you can imagine, I was up all night scrutinizing the returns. (NOTE TO

Product Details

ISBN:
9781400047574
Publisher:
Random House
Location:
New York
Author:
Barry, Dave
Subject:
American wit and humor
Subject:
Essays
Subject:
Form - Essays
Edition Number:
1st ed.
Edition Description:
Us
Series Volume:
107-261
Publication Date:
September 2003
Binding:
Hardcover
Language:
English
Illustrations:
Yes
Pages:
256
Dimensions:
8.60x5.74x.86 in. .83 lbs.

Related Subjects

Arts and Entertainment » Humor » Anthologies
Arts and Entertainment » Humor » Narrative

Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism
0 stars - 0 reviews
$ In Stock
Product details 256 pages Crown Publishers - English 9781400047574 Reviews:
"Synopsis" by , The New York Times calls him “the funniest man in America,” and his legions of fans agree, laughing and snorting as they put his books on bestseller lists nationwide.

In Boogers Are My Beat, Dave gives us the real scoop on:

• The scientific search for the world’s funniest joke (you can bet it includes the word “weasel”)

• RV camping in the Wal-Mart parking lot

• Outwitting “smart” kitchen appliances and service contracts

• Elections in Florida (“You can’t spell Florida without ‘duh’”)

• The Olympics, where people from all over the world come together to accuse each other of cheating

• The truth about the Dakotas, the Lone Ranger, and feng shui

• The choice between death and taxes

And much, much more—including some truths about journalism and serious thoughts about 9/11.

Dave Barry won the Pulitzer Prize for commentary in 1988, and his columns are syndicated in more than 500 newspapers. His most recent books, Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down and the novels Big Trouble and Tricky Business, were national bestsellers. He lives in Miami, Floriduh.

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