Synopses & Reviews
What happens when children are more mature than their parents? Growing up with an emotionally unavailable, immature, or selfish parent is painful, but rarely discussed. In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson exposes an often overlooked, yet extremely common syndrome that shapes the lives of so many people.
Are you one of the countless people who grew up with emotionally immature parents? If you suffer from this troubling parent/child dynamic, you may still recall painful moments from your childhood when your emotional needs were not met, when your feelings were dismissed, or when you took on adult levels of maturity in an effort to compensate” for your parents behavior. And while you likely cultivated strengths such as self-reliance and independence along the waystrengths that have served you well as an adulthaving to be the emotionally mature person in your relationship with your parent is confusing and even damaging. If you are ready to gain the insight you need to move on from feelings of loneliness and abandonment and find healthy ways to meet your own emotional needs, this book will help light the way. Youll discover the four main types of emotionally immature parents:
- Emotional parents, who may vacillate between over-involvement and abandonment, leading to frightening instability and unpredictability
- Driven parents, who are often compulsively busy and cant stop trying to perfect everything, including other people
- Passive parents, who may have a laissez-faire mindset and avoid dealing with anything upsetting
- Rejecting parents, who may withdraw from any relationship with their child, showing either detachment or anger as primary responses
All emotionally immature parents have one defining characteristic in common, even if they differ in stylenone of them puts their childs needs first. This book will show you that you are not to blame for your parents behavior. It also offers real skills for handling difficult family situations and moving on from the emotional wounds of your childhood. If you are ready to gain a greater understanding of both your parents and yourself
, this book provides a much-needed guide.
Being a parent is usually all about giving of yourself to foster your child's growth and development. But what happens when this isn't the case? Some parents dismiss the needs of their children, asserting their own instead, demanding attention and reassurance from even very young children. This may especially be the case when a parent has narcissistic tendencies or narcissistic personality disorder. From the author of Working with the Self-Absorbed and Loving the Self-Absorbed, this major revision of a self-help classic offers a step-by-step approach to resolving conflict and building a meaningful relationship with a narcissistic parent.
Children of the Self-Absorbed offers clear definitions of narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder to help you identify the extent of your parent's problem. You'll learn the different types of destructive narcissism and how to recognize their effects on relationships. With the aid of proven techniques, you'll discover that you're not helpless against your parent's behavior and that you needn't consider giving up on the relationship. Instead, realistic strategies and steps are suggested for learning to set mutually agreed upon behaviors that can help you fulfill your needs and expectations.
A second edition of a self-help classic, Children of the Self-Absorbed offers the adult children of narcissistic parents the means to understand and cope with the behaviors and attitudes of their mothers and/or fathers while still meeting their own needs.
Reading Line] Protecting yourself, letting go of old patterns, and building a new sense of self
Disarming the Narcissist, Second Edition, is a practical, step-by-step communication guide for coping with and confronting a narcissist. In the book, readers learn how to respond with empathy, separate themselves from the narcissist's traps, and gain the respect and validation they deserve. This edition includes new chapters dealing with narcissistic women, aggressive and abusive narcissists, strategies for safety, and the link between narcissism and sex addiction.
Do you know someone who is overly arrogant, shows an extreme lack of empathy, or exhibits an inflated sense of entitlement? Do they exploit others, or engage in magical thinking? These are all traits of narcissistic personality disorder, and when it comes to dealing with narcissists, it can be difficult to get your point across. So how do you handle the narcissistic people in your life? You might interact with them in social or professional settings, and you might even love one—so ignoring them isn’t really a practical solution. They're frustrating, and maybe even intimidating, but ultimately, you need to find a way of communicating effectively with them.
Disarming the Narcissist, Second Edition, will show you how to move past the narcissist's defenses using compassionate, empathetic communication. You'll learn how narcissists view the world, how to navigate their coping styles, and why, oftentimes, it's sad and lonely being a narcissist. By learning to anticipate and avoid certain hot-button issues, you'll be able to relate to narcissists without triggering aggression. By validating some common narcissistic concerns, you'll also find out how to be heard in conversation with a narcissist.
This book will help you learn to meet your own needs while side-stepping unproductive power struggles and senseless arguments with someone who is at the center of his or her own universe. This new edition also includes new chapters on dealing with narcissistic women, aggressive and abusive narcissists, strategies for safety, and the link between narcissism and sex addiction. Finally, you'll learn how to set limits with your narcissist and when it's time to draw the line on unacceptable behavior.
In Children of the Depressed, a depression expert helps adult children understand and overcome common problems that stem from growing up with a depressed parent, such as poor communication skills and negative self-talk. Using skills and practices rooted in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), readers will learn to shed the old dynamics and ways of thinking that have been weighing them down. By identifying and recognizing the feelings they experienced at a young age, readers will start laying the groundwork for a happier and healthier lifesocially, physically, emotionally, and psychologically.
Have you ever wondered, Why am I so negative? or Why is my life so chaotic? Whether or not your parent was ever formally diagnosed with depression, youve probably always known there was something different about your upbringing. And even though youve grown up and moved on, you may still feel the after-effects of living with your parents illness. In Children of the Depressed, a depression expert helps adult children understand and overcome common problems that stem from growing up with a depressed parent, such as poor communication skills and negative self-talk. Using skills and practices rooted in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), you will learn to shed the old dynamics and ways of thinking that have been weighing you down and keeping you from enjoying healthy relationships and the life you deserve.
Most books on depression only focus on getting help for the depressed person. This book is written for you, the adult child of parents with who have struggled with depression. You need emotional healing after a dysfunctional childhood, and most importantlyyou need an opportunity for your voice to be heard. You dont have to become stuck in the past. By identifying and recognizing the feelings you experienced at a young age, you will start laying the groundwork for a happier and healthier lifesocially, physically, emotionally, and psychologically.
What happens when children are more mature than their parents? Growing up with an emotionally unavailable, immature, or selfish parent is painful, but rarely discussed. In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson exposes an often overlooked, yet extremely common syndrome that shapes the lives of so many people. Gibson also provides powerful skills to help the adult children of self-centered parents gain the insight they need to move on from feelings of loneliness and abandonment, and find healthy ways to meet their own emotional needs.
As self-absorbed parents grow older and become more dependent on their adult children, hurtful relationships may resurface and become further strained. In the tradition of the best-selling Children of the Self-Absorbed, author Nina Brown offers the first book for adult children of aging narcissistic or self-absorbed parents. Readers will learn practical yet powerful strategies for navigating the intense negative feelings that these parents can incite, as well as tips to protect their children from the criticism, blame, or hostility that may exist between their parent and grandparents.
Growing up with a parent who is self-absorbed is difficult, and they may become more difficult to deal with as they age. This essential book shows how to cope with your aging parent's narcissistic behavior, and provides tips to help protect yourself and your children from their self-absorbed, destructive actions.
As your self-absorbed parent grows older and becomes more dependent on you, hurtful relationships may resurface and become further strained. In the tradition of Children of the Self-Absorbed, author Nina Brown offers the first book for adult children of aging narcissistic or self-absorbed parents. You will learn practical, powerful strategies for navigating the intense negative feelings that your parents can incite, as well as tips to protect your children from the criticism, blame, or hostility that may exist between you and their grandparent.
In this book, you will gain greater awareness of how and why your parent's self-absorbed behaviors and attitudes get worse, and develop strategies to manage the negative feelings that can arise as a result. You'll also learn to reduce the shame and guilt that may be felt when you feel like you don't want to be a caretaker. Finally, you'll learn to set limits with your parent so you can stay sane during this difficult time.
Having an aging parent can be stressful enough, but dealing with an aging narcissistic or self-absorbed parent is especially challenging. This essential guide will help you through.
If you grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, you may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, or abandonment. You may recall your childhood as a time when your emotional needs were not met, when your feelings were dismissed, or when you took on adult levels of responsibility in an effort to compensate for your parents behavior. These wounds can be healed, and you can move forward in your life.
In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect, and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, youll learn how to create positive, new relationships so you can build a better life.
Discover the four types of difficult parents:
- The emotional parent instills feelings of instability and anxiety
- The driven parent stays busy trying to perfect everything and everyone
- The passive parent avoids dealing with anything upsetting
- The rejecting parent is withdrawn, dismissive, and derogatory
About the Author
Wendy T. Behary, LCSW, is founder and clinical director of the Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and a faculty member at the Cognitive Therapy Center and Schema Therapy Institute of New York. She is also a distinguished founding fellow of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. She maintains a private practice, specializing in narcissism and high-conflict couples therapy.Jeffrey Young, PhD, is the author of Schema Therapy: a Practitioner's Guide and founder/director of the Schema Therapy Institute Schema Therapy Institute of New York.Daniel J. Siegel, MD, is executive director of the Mindsight Institute and associate clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of California, Los Angeles School of Medicine. He is author of The Developing Mind, The Mindful Brain, and other books, and founding editor of the Norton Series on Interpersonal Neurobiology.
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