Synopses & Reviews
The tools you need to break the patterns of codependency
Codependency is a learned behavior that can be passed down from generation to generation. Codependents have trouble accepting themselves, so they hide who they are to be accepted by someone else. Codependency For Dummies offers assistance in understanding the history, symptoms, causes, and relationship dynamics of codependency and lays out a clear plan for recovery with exercises, practical advice, and daily reminders to help you know, honor, protect, and express yourself.
Are you codependent? discover the typical symptoms of codependency and take a self-assessment questionnaire to determine if you're a codependent
"De-Nile" isn't just a river find out how you've denied someone else's behavior, your codependency, your feelings, and your needs and how you can overcome it
Find your voice and take action get the tools you need to communicate assertively, set boundaries, bring positive experiences into your life, and cope with relapse
Put the "I" in independence put your new-found self-esteem into action by setting goals and pursuing your passions
Don't go it alone reach out for help and support with Twelve Step meetings, retreats, psychotherapy, hotlines, and shelters
Open the book and find:
Characteristics of codependents
The importance of making recovery your first priority
Functional and dysfunctional family systems
How your upbringing could have led you down the path to codependency
What letting go and detachment entail
Tips for learning to value yourself
Childhood wounds that need to be healed
Daily reminders
Learn to:
Break the pattern of conduct that keeps you in harmful relationships
Create healthy boundaries, coping skills, and expectations
Eliminate feelings of guilt, blame, and responsibility
Heal a dysfunctional relationship
Synopsis
Codependency For Dummies helps readers:
- come to understand how their actions and behavior enable the person who is directly affected by the disease, addiction, or condition
- learn how to eliminate feelings of guilt, blame, and responsibility to allow them to take back control of their life
- discover how to communicate and interact with sufferers to create healthy boundaries, coping skills, and expectations
- be provided with expert techniques and advice for healing a “dysfunctional” family or relationship
Synopsis
The tools you need to break the patterns of codependencyCodependency often affects a spouse, parent, sibling, friend, or coworker of a person afflicted with alcohol or drug dependence. Similar patterns can been seen in people in relationships with chronically or mentally ill individuals. Codependency For Dummies is a resource for those struggling with this unhealthy lifestyle and helps you break the pattern of conduct that keeps you in dysfunctional and mentally or physically harmful relationships.
In Codependency For Dummies, you'll come to understand how your actions and behavior enable the person who is directly affected by the disease, addiction, or condition; learn how to eliminate feelings of guilt, blame, and responsibility to allow yourself to take back control of your life; discover how to communicate and interact with sufferers to create healthy boundaries, coping skills, and expectations; and get expert techniques and advice for healing a "dysfunctional" family or relationship.
- Discover how your behavior enables a loved one's disease, addiction, or condition
- Learn to create healthy boundaries
- Break codependent patterns
Codependency For Dummies is an invaluable resource for the millions of Americans struggling in codependent relationships, arming you with expert knowledge and guidance to confidently get your life back.
Synopsis
Codependency is much more widespread than originally thought. You don’t even have to be in a relationship. Codependents have trouble accepting themselves, so they hide who they are to be accepted by someone else.
Codependency for Dummies is the most comprehensive book on the topic to date. It describes the history, symptoms, causes, and relationship dynamics of codependency and provides self-assessment questionnaires. The majority of the book is devoted to healing and lays out a clear plan for recovery with exercises, practical advice, and helpful daily reminders to help you know, honor, protect, and express yourself.
It clarifies deep psychological dynamics that underlie codependency, yet is written in a conversational style that’s easily understandable by everyone.
You will learn:
- How to raise your self-esteem
- The difference between care-giving and codependent care-taking
- The difference between healthy and dysfunctional families
- How to set boundaries
- How to separate responsibility for yourself and for others
- How to overcome guilt and resentment
About the Author
Darlene Lancer, MFT, is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, having worked with individuals and couples for 25 years. She's a consultant, author, and speaker on relationships and codependency. Find her blog and more at darlenelancer.com and whatiscodependency.com.
Table of Contents
Introduction 1
Part I: What is Codependency and Who is Codependent? 7
Chapter 1: When Relationships Hurt 9
Chapter 2: A New Definition of Codependency 27
Chapter 3: Characteristics of Codependents 39
Chapter 4: So, Are You Codependent? 69
Part II: Breaking the Cycle of Codependency: Beginning Recovery 77
Chapter 5: Crossing De-Nile to Recovery 79
Chapter 6: The Process of Recovery 89
Chapter 7: How Did You Become Codependent? 97
Chapter 8: Taking Stock of Who You Are 119
Chapter 9: Nonattachment and Acceptance 133
Chapter 10: Learning to Value Yourself 155
Part III: The Skills: Taking Action 169
Chapter 11: Finding Your Voice 171
Chapter 12: Recovery and Your Family, Friends, and Lovers 191
Chapter 13: Going for the Gold – Healing Your Past 203
Chapter 14: Healing Pleasures 221
Chapter 15: Coping with Relapse 237
Part IV: Standing on Your Own: Leaving Codependency Behind 249
Chapter 16: Relationships that Work 251
Chapter 17: Empowering You 269
Chapter 18: Where to Get Help 285
Part V: The Part of Tens 293
Chapter 19: Ten Ways to Love Yourself 295
Chapter 20: Ten Daily Reminders 301