Synopses & Reviews
You’re probably familiar with the old saying, once bitten, twice shy. It describes a painful uncertainty many of us feel every day as we try to engage with other people. Acts of betrayal from our pasts can lead us into long cycles of wariness and mistrust. An inability to trust wisely can lead us to loneliness and isolation, or worse—putting our trust in the wrong people too easily.
The good news is that the ability to trust is both a choice and a skill that you can develop. You do not have to be controlled by the past. To a child, trust is a feeling that comes and goes, always under the influence of other people. Only as an adult can you learn how and when to trust more wisely. This book is a warm and friendly guide to achieving greater self-confidence and deeper levels of intimacy and trust.
Helped along by the book’s exercises and ideas for self-reflection, you’ll begin to develop new patterns of trust. Start by getting comfortable trusting your own instincts. Then, experiment with developing relationships based on mutual trust and curiosity. Learn from and then let go of old betrayals that have impaired your trust-building skills, and approach the rest of your life with a renewed sense of purpose and belonging.
Review
“In
The Courage to Trust, Cynthia Wall helps us to discover the genuine source of much of our pain and the pain in our relationships and offers us simple, powerful ways to begin to heal it. This wise and beautifully written book is a blessing for every friend, every parent, every lover and every human being.”
—Rachel Naomi Remen, MD, clinical professor of family and community medicine at the University of California, San Francisco, School of Medicine; medical director of the Commonweal Cancer Help Program; and author of Kitchen Table Wisdom and My Grandfather's Blessings
Synopsis
We are social beings. Our lives are connected to hundreds of others by ties both intimate and formal, casual and lifelong. Secure, trusting relationships form the foundation for many of our more positive and rewarding experiences. But when individuals lose their capacity to trust others because of some painful past experience, their ability to function in our interconnected, social world is severely limited. This book proposes a series of strategies anyone can use to help learn how, when, and whom to trust.
Grounding this book is the author's own concept of the three core selves: the adult, the child, and the protector. Each of these personae influences trust. With a clearer understanding of how and why their own personal trust pattern functions, readers will use the book's cognitive behavioral exercises to help rewrite negative messages of shame, betrayal, and hurt that often underlie unhealthy patterns of trust. The new skills the book teaches will help readers have faith in their instincts, develop healthy relationships, and let go of negative experiences that have made trusting frightening and difficult.
Synopsis
Psychotherapist Cynthia Wall shows readers how to rebuild damaged patterns of trust that have been affected by negative past experiences. The book teaches readers to use CBT to gain self-trust, develop strong instincts about who to trust, and cultivate strong relationships with others based on mutual trust, respect, and healthy curiosity.
About the Author
Cynthia Wall, LCSW, earned her master's degree in social work at the University of California, Berkeley, and works in private practice counseling individuals and couples. Her specialty is helping people claim freedom from the limits created by loss and betrayal. She is a volunteer with the American Red Cross and the local hospice in Fort Bragg, CA, where she helps train volunteers and is also involved with the Compassionate Friends, a support group for bereaved parents.Sue Patton Thoele is a psychotherapist, former hospice chaplain, and bereavement group leader. She is author of several books, including The Courage to Be Yourself.
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