Synopses & Reviews
Both fearful of abandonment and prone to impulsive, inappropriate behaviors that typically drive others away, people with BPD often have unstable relationships with those closest to them. There may seem to be no end to the arguments, accusations, and guilt both BPD sufferers and their families face. The program in Families and Borderline Personality Disorder was developed by dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) expert Alan Fruzzetti to help family members of people with BPD manage their emotions and reactions in ways that not only help their family member with BPD, but also enable family members to remain consistent with their own personal boundaries and values.
Founded on the core principle of reciprocity, this program helps family members take a blame-free approach to interacting with their loved one with BPD. The program encourages readers to act in ways that reflect their own core values, shows readers how to validate the BPD sufferer in their life in order to help him or her to develop emotion regulation skills, and offers skills for drawing boundaries so that readers do not internalize blame, guilt, or a sense of responsibility for their loved oneís actions and responses. Readers also learn the same DBT skills that are so helpful to BPD sufferers themselves in order to reduce stress and conflict, decrease feelings of depression and hopelessness, and build the familyís support for their loved one with BPD. The program in this book has already been used successfully with thousands of families, and has been proven effective by an independent study. By learning and applying these skills, families can remain strong and supportive, forming the perfect environment for helping BPD sufferers recover and learn and practice skills for helping themselves.
Some couples need more than just the run-of-the-mill relationship advice to solve their problems in love. When out-of-control emotions are the root cause of problems in a relationship, no amount of effective communication or intimacy building will fix what ails it. What these high-conflict couples need is help regulating the emotions that provoke the escape or win mode of interaction that has come to define them. This book adapts dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) into a powerful set of emotion regulation tools. Using mindfulness and distress tolerance techniques, readers learn how to deescalate conflict situations before they have a chance to flare into serious fights. Other techniques help partners in a relationship validate one another's experiences. Ultimately, readers who practice the techniques in this book will learn how to manage problems with negotiation, not conflict, and how to find true acceptance and closeness with each other.
In this book, a noted expert in the use of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) in couples' therapy adapts a powerful set of emotion regulation tools into techniques for addressing relationship issues.
You hear and read a lot about ways to improve your relationship. But if you've tried these without much success, you're not alone. Many highly reactive couples—pairs that are quick to argue, anger, and blame—need more than just the run-of-the-mill relationship advice to solve their problems in love. When destructive emotions are at the heart of problems in your relationship, no amount of effective communication or intimacy building will fix what ails it. If you're part of a "high-conflict" couple, you need to get control of your emotions first, to stop making things worse, and only then work on building a better relationship.
The High-Conflict Couple adapts the powerful techniques of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) into skills you can use to tame out-of-control emotions that flare up in your relationship. Using mindfulness and distress tolerance techniques, you'll learn how to deescalate angry situations before they have a chance to explode into destructive fights. Other approaches will help you disclose your fears, longings, and other vulnerabilities to your partner and validate his or her experiences in return. You'll discover ways to manage problems with negotiation, not conflict, and to find true acceptance and closeness with the person you love the most.
This is the first book to use dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) to help high-conflict couples regulate out-of-control emotions, tolerate distressing situations, and resolve problemsan approach proven to help even the most highly reactive couples build healthy relationships.
After a messy divorce, its all too common for one parent to try and undermine the relationship between their children and their ex. In Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex, readers are offered a positive parenting approach to coping with a hostile ex-spouse. Inside, mothers and fathers who are dealing with a toxic ex will learn how to avoid parental alienation, as well as techniques for talking to their children in a way that fosters open and honest response. Divorce can be painful, but with the right tools parents can protect their kids and build stronger, more trusting relationships.
There's no question about it: your children are the most important thing in your life. But if you have gone through a messy divorce, your relationship with your children may become strained if you have to deal with a toxic ex. Your ex may bad-mouth you in front of the kids, accuse you of being a bad parent, and even attempt to replace you in the childrens lives with a new partner. As a result, your children may become confused, conflicted, angry, anxious, or depressedand you may feel powerless. In Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex, a nationally recognized parenting expert offers you a positive parenting approach to dealing with a hostile ex-spouse. You'll learn to avoid the most common mistakes of coparenting, how to avoid parental alienation syndrome,” and effective techniques for talking to your children in a way that fosters open and honest response. In addition, youll learn how to protect your children from painful loyalty conflicts between you and your ex-spouse.
Divorce is often painful, especially if your ex habitually tries to undermine your relationship with your children. But with the right tools you can protect your kids and make your relationship with them stronger than ever. This book can show you how. You can find out more about this book and about author Amy J.L. Baker at www.amyjlbaker.com.
In Anxious in Love, an Imago therapist and a couples therapist present practical relationship tools for people struggling with any anxiety disorder that leaves them feeling disconnected and misunderstood by their partners. These strategies will help readers apply practical tools for healing their anxiety, communicating their needs, and improving their relationships.
Healthy relationships require trust, intimacy, effective communication, and understanding. However, if you suffer from chronic anxiety you may have trouble dealing with everyday conflicts and tensions that can arise in relationships. No matter how committed you are, anxiety can leave you feeling distanced from your partner. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to overcome the anxiety-fueled reactions that keep you from achieving true closeness in your relationship.
Written by two experts on anxiety disorders, Anxious in Love offers easy-to-use techniques for calming anxieties and strengthening communication in your relationship. With this book, you will learn to stay centered when faced with conflict, understand your partners perspective, and become more independent. By changing the way you react to triggers and stress, you will be able to focus on enjoying time with the one you love, without anxiety getting in the way.
In The High-Conflict Custody Battle, a team of legal and psychology experts present a practical guidebook for people going through a high-conflict custody battle. Readers dealing with overtly hostile, inflammatory, deceitful, or manipulative ex-spouses will learn how to find an attorney and prepare for a custody evaluation. The book also provides helpful tips to defend against false accusations, and gives a realistic portrayal of what to expect during the legal process.
Is your ex-spouse trying to gain custody of your kids? Has he or she launched a campaign to make you look like a bad parent, both in the eyes of your children and the law? You aren’t alone. Unfortunately, high-conflict custody battles are all-too-common in today’s world. So how can you arm yourself with the mental and legal resources needed to survive this difficult time and keep your kids safe?
In The High-Conflict Custody Battle, a team of legal and psychology experts present a practical guidebook for people like you who are engaged in a high-conflict custody battle. If you are dealing with an overtly hostile, inflammatory, deceitful, or manipulative ex-spouse, you will learn how to find and work with an attorney and prepare for a custody evaluation. The book also provides helpful tips you can use to defend yourself against false accusations, and gives a realistic portrayal of what to expect during a legal fight.
Going through a divorce is hard, but going through a custody battle can feel like war. Don’t go in unprepared. With this book as your guide, you will be able to navigate this difficult process and learn powerful skills that will help you maintain a healthy relationship with your kids, fight unfair accusations, and uphold your rights as a parent.
Every couple fights—it’s how you fight that can determine the success of your relationship. This book teaches you to look beyond what you and your partner fight about, and discover the core issues that undermine your relationship.
In the midst of a disagreement, many couples ask themselves, “What are we really fighting about?” Sound familiar? As it turns out, breakups and divorce don’t happen because couples fight, they happen because of how couples fight. In this much-needed book, Judith and Bob Wright—two married counselors and coaches with over thirty years of experience helping couples learn how to fight well—present their tried-and-true methods for exploring the emotions that underlie many relationship fights.
In this unique guide, you’ll learn how to use disagreements as an opportunity to deepen your understanding of your partner, bring more intimacy to the relationship, strengthen your bond, and really learn from the conflicts and tensions that occur between you. You’ll also learn how to navigate the fifteen most common fights couples have, including “the blame game,” “dueling over dollars,” “If you really loved me, you’d…,” “told-you-so’s,” and more.
If you’re ready to start fighting for your love, rather than against it, this book will show you how.
Grounded in proven-effective dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) principles, Families and Borderline Personality Disorder offers a practical, skills-oriented program for maintaining a healthy and balanced relationship with a family member suffering from borderline personality disorder.
About the Author
Amy J. L. Baker, PhD, is a national expert on parental alienation and has written a seminal book on the topic, Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome, published by W. W. Norton & Company. In addition to conducting trainings around the country for parents as well as legal and mental health professionals, Baker has written dozens of scholarly articles on topics related to parent/child relationships and has appeared on national TV, including Good Morning America, CNN, and The Joy Behar Show. She has been quoted in The New York Times and U.S. News & World Report, among other print media outlets. Baker graduated from Barnard College, summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa. She has a PhD in human development from Teachers College, Columbia University.
J. Michael Bone, PhD, has a doctorate from the Graduate Faculty of Political and Social Science of the New School for Social Research in New York, NY. He has served as a mental health expert, consultant, and advisor to the court on parental alienation cases around the United States, and maintains a consulting practice in Florida.Brian Ludmer, BComm, LLB, is an attorney whose practice is based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. He has a Bachelor of Commerce (1982) and Bachelor of Law (1985) from the University of Toronto. Ludmer has practiced corporate and securities law for twenty-seven years and in parallel he conducts a family law practice focused on situations involving custody disputes, child estrangement, and parental alienation, as well as high net worth divorce litigation and business valuation.
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