Synopses & Reviews
More scathing than a thumbs down, more inflamed than burning film in an overheated projector—such are the reviews that Roger Ebert has penned about bad movies. Collected here are more than 200 of his most biting, sarcastic, and funny critiques, selected from those unlucky movies that garnered a rating of a mere two stars or fewer.
Roger Ebert's I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie and Your Movie Sucks, which gathered some of his most scathing reviews, were best-sellers. This new collection continues the tradition, reviewing not only movies that were at the bottom of the barrel, but also movies that he found underneath the barrel.
A Horrible Experience of Unbearable Length collects more than 200 of his reviews since 2006 in which he gave movies two stars or fewer. Known for his fair-minded and well-written film reviews, Roger is at his razor-sharp humorous best when skewering bad movies. Consider this opener for the one-star Your Highness:
"Your Highness is a juvenile excrescence that feels like the work of 11-year-old boys in love with dungeons, dragons, warrior women, pot, boobs, and four-letter words. That this is the work of David Gordon Green beggars the imagination. One of its heroes wears the penis of a minotaur on a string around his neck. I hate it when that happens."
And finally, the inspiration for the title of this book, the one-star Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen:
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments. One of these involves a doglike robot humping the leg of the heroine. If you want to save yourself the ticket price go, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination."
Movie buffs and humor lovers alike will relish this treasury of movies so bad that you may just want to see them for a good laugh!
Review
andldquo;Sharp, wry, andandmdash;for this Cannes veteranandmdash;right on the mark.andrdquo;
Review
andldquo;About as nourishing as a croissant, but like that airy pastry, itandrsquo;s fun to devour.andrdquo;
Review
andldquo;A charming little book.andrdquo;
Review
andldquo;A lively blend of prose and pen-and-ink sketches. . . . Ebertandrsquo;s prose style is fresh, his observations both witty and sharp.andrdquo;
Review
andldquo;Perhaps the best book ever written about experiencing the Cannes Film Festival.andrdquo;
Synopsis
More scathing than a thumbs down, more inflamed than burning film in an overheated projector—such are the reviews that Roger Ebert has penned about bad movies. Collected here are more than 200 of his most biting, sarcastic, and funny critiques, selected from those unlucky movies that garnered a rating of a mere two stars or fewer.
Roger Ebert's I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie and Your Movie Sucks, which gathered some of his most scathing reviews, were best-sellers. This new collection continues the tradition, reviewing not only movies that were at the bottom of the barrel, but also movies that he found underneath the barrel.
A Horrible Experience of Unbearable Length collects more than 200 of his reviews since 2006 in which he gave movies two stars or fewer. Known for his fair-minded and well-written film reviews, Roger is at his razor-sharp humorous best when skewering bad movies. Consider this opener for the one-star Your Highness:
"Your Highness is a juvenile excrescence that feels like the work of 11-year-old boys in love with dungeons, dragons, warrior women, pot, boobs, and four-letter words. That this is the work of David Gordon Green beggars the imagination. One of its heroes wears the penis of a minotaur on a string around his neck. I hate it when that happens."
And finally, the inspiration for the title of this book, the one-star Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen:
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments. One of these involves a doglike robot humping the leg of the heroine. If you want to save yourself the ticket price go, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination."
Movie buffs and humor lovers alike will relish this treasury of movies so bad that you may just want to see them for a good laugh!
Synopsis
and#160; and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;
Two Weeks in the Midday Sun records Ebertandrsquo;s impressions of the 1987 Cannes festivalandmdash;andldquo;Disneyland for adultsandrdquo;andmdash;running through his two weeks of encounters with actors and directors, going to screenings, cafes, bars, restaurants, and parties in this marathon of over-stimulation. andldquo;If the Super Bowl were two weeks long,andrdquo; he writes, andldquo;that would be more like Cannes.andrdquo;and#160; Screenings start at 8:30 every morning, while the (third round of) parties started at midnight the night before. andldquo;The only constant will be my battle with my computer. . . . If I am lucky, however, something extraordinary will happen to me during the festival.and#160; I will see a film that will make my spine tingle with its greatness, and I will leave the theater speechless.andrdquo;
and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160;and#160; The book is funny and passionate, a memoir/travelogue/love letter to the movies. This reprint includes Ebertandrsquo;s pen and ink sketches as well as Martin Scorseseandrsquo;s new foreword and a hilariousand#160; appendix by Ebert describing a dinner in Cannes with Scorsese in 1997.
Synopsis
A paragon of cinema criticism for decades, Roger Ebertandmdash;with his humor, sagacity, and no-nonsense thumbandmdash;achieved a renown unlikely ever to be equaled. His tireless commentary has been greatly missed since his death, but, thankfully, in addition to his mountains of daily reviews, Ebert also left behind a legacy of lyrical long-form writing. And with
Two Weeks in the Midday Sun, we get a glimpse not only into Ebert the man, but also behind the scenes of one of the most glamorous and peculiar of cinematic rituals: the Cannes Film Festival.
More about people than movies, this book is an intimate, quirky, and witty account of the parade of personalities attending the 1986 festivalandmdash;Ebertandrsquo;s twelfth, and the fortieth anniversary of the event. A wonderful raconteur with an excellent sense of pacing, Ebert presents lighthearted ruminations on his daily routine and computer troubles alongside more serious reflection on directors such as Fellini and Coppola, screenwriters like Charles Bukowski, actors such as Isabella Rossellini and John Malkovich, the very American press agent and social maverick Billy andldquo;Silver Dollarandrdquo; Baxter, and the stylishly plunging necklines of yore. He also comments on the trajectory of the festival itself and the andldquo;enormous happinessandrdquo; of sitting, anonymous and quiet, in an ordinary French cafandeacute;. And, of course, he talks movies.
Illustrated with Ebertandrsquo;s charming sketches of the festival and featuring a new foreword by Martin Scorcese, Two Weeks in the Midday Sun is a small treasure, a window onto the mind of this connoisseur of criticism and satire, a man always so funny, so un-phony, so completely, unabashedly himself.
About the Author
Roger Ebert (1942-2013) was a film critic for the Chicago Sun-Times for more than forty years. In 1975 he became the first film critic to win the Pulitzer Prize. That same year he teamed up with his rival critic, Gene Siskel of the Chicago Tribune, to host a movie review program on public television. Sneak Previews became the most popular entertainment program on the PBS network and gave Ebert a nationwide audience. He was the author of numerous books on film including Awake in the Dark: The Best of Roger Ebert, the Great Movies essay collections, and a memoir, Life Itself.