Synopses & Reviews
As Nia Vardalos
(My Big Fat Greek Wedding) points out, These stories will make milk shoot from one of your nostrils and a martini from the other. Johanna Stein brings to mind the unflinching honesty and compassion of Nora Ephron.”
Looking for the perfect book to help you survive childbirth and parenting with your sanity intact? Look elsewhere. For Johanna Stein, parenting is an extreme sport. Her stories from the trenches may not always be shared experienceshave you ever turned a used airplane barf-bag into a puppet to calm your wailing baby?but they will always make you laugh. Columnist Lisa Belkin advises: It is dangerous to read [Johanna] any place where it is inappropriate to laugh uncontrollably. It is also dangerous to read her if your bladder control is not what it once was. But once you soldier through and do read her you have made a friendone who gets it and makes it easier to do because shes on your team.”
So, no, this book wont teach you how to deal with nipple blisters or oedipal complexes. But if you want to learn why you should never attempt to play a practical joke in the delivery room, then youre in the right place.
Review
"Johanna Stein's essays make me laugh way too loud, way too hard, and way too long. She's like the David Sedaris of moms."Annie Mumolo, cowriter,
Bridesmaids"These stories will make milk shoot from one of your nostrils and a martini from the other. Johanna Stein brings to mind the unflinching honesty and compassion of Nora Ephron."Nia Vardalos, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, New York Times bestselling author, Instant Mom
"Johanna Stein is one of the funniest women on the planet."Alanis Morissette
"It is dangerous to read her any place where it is inappropriate to laugh uncontrollably. It is also dangerous to read her if your bladder control is not what it once was after childbirth. But once you soldier through and do read her, you have made a friendone who 'gets it' and makes 'it' easier to do because she's on your team."Lisa Belkin, bestselling author, Senior Columnist, Huffington Post
"Much more than 'mommy lit,' this book will make any reader laugh so hard they'll pee a little. Or maybe a lot."Beth Littleford, actress and The Daily Show correspondent
"Johanna Stein is lovely, insightful, and a big bowl of funny."Jeff Garlin, comedian/writer/producer, Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Goldbergs
"Johanna Stein has a way of taking the good, the bad, and the ugly and turning it into a delicious piece of candy. ('Mind candy' of course, as real candy is 'bad' for you, as any good mother knows). Simply put: I love her writing. I love the way she lays it all out there with such honesty and candor and tremendous relatability."Mo Collins, actress and comedian, MADtv, Parks and Recreation
"Johanna Stein's wit, humor, compassion, and quirky underdog view on life make her stories a pure joy to read. I just cannot get enough of her writing."Tracy Vilar, actress, House M.D.
"Since her days as a comic with a guitar, writer/comedienne Johanna Stein has never failed to surprise, delight, and blow audiences away with her fearless storytelling. And when I say fearless, I don't mean the, 'Gee, sometimes my kids make me so mad I want to have two glasses of chardonnay!' kind. No, I mean fearless in the making you gasp, 'Oh she did not do that!' way. Stein is the kind of writer we all aspire to be, the fab girl next door who lures you in with unadorned honesty and witty prose and then slams you in to the messy truth in such a viscerally compelling way that you cannot not be moved to laughter, to tears, and most of all to appreciating the great joy of what it means to be human."Dani Klein Modisett, writer/producer/editor, Afterbirth, Huffington Post contributor
Library Journal, 5/14/14
While the author might proclaim herself as a questionable source when it comes to parenting, her credentials in chuckles as undisputed
Stein has such a delightfully immature sense of humor
that the reader feels compelled to continue reading in anticipation of what she might possibly say next
Stein gives a laugh-out-loud presentation sure to be a hit with the no-punches crowd.”
New York Times
A book that grew from a now-classic Motherlode essay of the same title, this is the rare funny book on becoming and being a mother that doesnt sound as if youve read it before (probably because it is chock-full of things most of us would never, ever say).”
Parents.com, 6/12/14
[Johanna Stein is] The Funniest Mom We Know
. If youre looking for a down-to-earth voice that lets you know youre not alone in a world of tough questions and embarrassing moments, How Not to Calm a Child on a Plane might become your new best friend. In Steins book debut, her self-deprecating humor will make you laugh out loud and inspire you to take the heart-stopping, forehead-slapping, blush-inducing moments of parenting a little more lightly. How Not to Calm a Child on a Plane is packed with brutally honest stories that will comfort any parents who sometimes feel inadequate (i.e. all parents) and will have even non-parents cracking up
Her voice is an ally for parents who just might learn to laugh at themselves too.”
Philadelphia Tribune, 6/8/14
A series of witty essays on author Johannas Steins foray into parenthood. Steins humor is infused with the tone of a mother who isnt afraid to tell it exactly like it is, but who, at the root of all the fart jokes and hysterical footnotes, loves her life as a parent
Stein has created a parenting book for what really to expect as a parent.”
WanderingEducators
Have you ever held treasure in your hands? You know, those books that make you laugh out loud throughout the entire book, nod your head in agreement, text best friends great lines, and induce a flurry of both written and oral recommendations on book sites and in person? I bet you can count these rare treasures on your fingers (maybe the fingers on just one of your hands). I now have three fingers held up (for my favorite funny writers: David Sedaris, Jenny Lawson, and Johanna Stein)
because another great book has been added to this joyful treasure chest of goodnesscomedian and writer Johanna Steins How Not to Calm a Child on a Plane (And Other Lessons in Parenting from a Highly Questionable Source). Its hilarious, honest, wry, life-affirming, and a great way to laugh about the vicissitudes of parenting.”
When Crazy Meets Exhaustion
Oh yeah. Vomit, death, F-bombs, and illegal placentas. ALL part of the gut-busting book, How Not to Calm a Child on a Plane
Johanna doesnt write; she creates. She creates this world with vivid colors and hilarious characters and describes them in such a way that you feel like youre on this acid trip of funny with her.”
Mamalode.com, 7/23/14
The worlds most relatable book
Youll laugh. Youll cry. Youll take notes.”
Celebrity Parents Magazine, Summer 2014
Witty essays
No other parenting book can prepare you for what to really expect when youre expecting”
GirlToMom.com, 7/23/14
Johanna is kind of a Tina Fey type, lovely and funny and bright and kind
[with] a very funny book on motherhood.”
BookPage, August 2014
A deliciously funny reminder that parenting doesnt have to be so serious
Stein is definitely not trying to replicate What Not to Expect When Youre Expecting. If anything, she is the anti-parenting guide, subtly using funny anecdotes to demonstrate that we can have fun with childrearing. She may not bestow nursing tips or ideas for planning the perfect playdate, but she will make you laugha lotabout the sweetness, messiness and absurdity of parenting.”
Synopsis
Hilarious linked essays about parenthood from film and TV writer/director/producer/actor whose work has been seen on Comedy Central, The Disney Channel, PBS, The Oxygen Network, VH-1, and in the New York Times and the Huffington Post.
Synopsis
Looking for the perfect book to help you survive childbirth and parenting with your sanity intact?
Look elsewhere.
For Johanna Stein (writer/comedian/forward/slash/abuser and occasionally neurotic/immature/way-too-candid mom), parenting is an extreme sport. Her stories from the trenches may not always be shared experiences—Have you ever wondered if your baby's "soft spot" is like a delete key? Trained your preschooler for a zombie invasion? Accused a nearly nude stranger of being pregnant? Made sweet, bimonthly love to your spouse while your toddler serenaded you through the adjoining wall? Attempted to calm your screaming baby on an airplane with a hand puppet, only to have it lead to one of the most disgusting experiences of your life?—but they will always make you laugh.
So, no, this book won't teach you how to deal with nipple blisters or Oedipal complexes. But if you want to learn why you should never attempt to play a practical joke in the hospital delivery room, then you're in the right place.
About the Author
Johanna Stein is currently a Staff Writer on Disneys upcoming, highly anticipated animated series,
Wander Over Yonder. In her jobs as writer, producer, director, and actor, Johannas work has appeared on Comedy Central, CBS, The Disney Channel, HBO, and many other outlets. In addition to her TV and film work, Johannas comedic essays on parenthood have been published in such outlets as
Parents Magazine, The New York Times, and the
Huffington Post. Johanna is unnaturally proud of her daughter, who, despite her guilt over having had many sips of beer while pregnant, has not turned out to be an ugly moron.
jojostein.com /
mothereffed.com