Synopses & Reviews
Men are right. The “relationship talk” does not help. Dr. Patricia Loves and
Dr. Steven Stosnys How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness:
Love is not about better communication.
It's about connection.
You'll never get a closer relationship
with your man by talking to him like you
talk to one of your girlfriends.
Male emotions are like women's sexuality:
you can't be too direct too quickly.
There are four ways to connect with a man:touch, activity, sex, routines.
Men want closer marriages just as much as women do,but not if they has to act like a woman.
Talking makes women move closer;
it makes men move away.
The secret of the silent male is this:
his wife supplies the meaning in his life.
The stunning truth about love is that talking doesnt help.
Have you ever had this conversation with your spouse?
Wife: “Honey, we need to talk about us.”
Husband: “Do we have to?”
Drs. Patricia Love and Steven Stosny have studied this all-too-familiar dynamic between men and women and have reached a truly shocking conclusion. Even with the best of intentions, talking about your relationship doesnt bring you together, and it will eventually drive you apart.
The reason for this is that underneath most couples fights, there is a biological difference at work. A womans vulnerability to fear and anxiety makes her draw closer, while a mans subtle sensitivity to shame makes him pull away in response. This is why so many married couples fall into the archetypal roles of nagging wife/stonewalling husband, and why improving a marriage cant happen through words.
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It teaches couples how to get closer in ways that dont require “trying to turn a man into a woman.” Rich in stories of couples who have turned their marriages around, and full of practical advice about the behaviors that make and break marriages, this essential guide will help couples find love beyond words.
Argues that talking about a relationship will not bring partners closer together, but instead can drive them farther apart, and offers practical suggestions for how to enhance a marriage that explains how to avoid the behaviors that break up a marriage, how to connect without words, and more. 30,000 first printing.
About the Author
Patricia Love, Ed.D., is an acclaimed therapist and speaker and author of four books, including Hot Monogamy
and The Truth About Love
. She has appeared on Oprah
and on CNN, and has contributed to many magazines, including Cosmopolitan
Steven Stosny, Ph.D., is a therapist who specializes in mens issues and has appeared on Oprah in two highly rated shows on men and marriage. He is the author of You Don't Have to Take It Anymore: Turn Your Resentful, Angry, or Emotionally Abusive Relationship into a Compassionate, Loving One.