Synopses & Reviews
The national bestseller Odd Girl Out exposed a hidden culture of cruelty that had always been quietly endured by American girls. As Rachel Simmons toured the country, these girls found their voices and spoke to her about their pain. They wanted to talk-and they weren't the only ones. Mothers, teachers, counselors, young professional women, even fathers, came to Rachel with heart-wrenching personal stories that could no longer be kept secret.
Here, Rachel creates a safe place for girls to talk, rant, sound off, and find each other. The result is a collection of wonderful accounts of the inner lives of adolescent girls. Candid and disarming, creative and expressive, and always exceptionally self-aware, these poems, songs, confessions, and essays form a journal of American girlhood. They show us how deeply cruelty flows and how strongly these girls want to change.
Odd Girl Out helped girls find their voices; Odd Girl Speaks Out helps them tell their stories.
I'm always the odd girl out
No one talks to me
I try to be friendly and speak out
But I'm invisible, see?
You know, gossip is a natural thing in high school. I'm one of those girls that will
do it right in front of you. I'll whisper at my friends and look at you the whole time.
Then we'll all cut up laughing. You know we're talking about you.
My best friend and I started being friends with this other girl. But she was fat. It was hard because she always wanted to go down the slide second and she would crush us. We didn't want to tell her she was fat, so we decided to drop her. Her mother called my mother and
told her we were being mean. But we just couldn't be friends with her anymore.
-from Odd Girl Speaks Out
Praise for ODD GIRL OUT
"There has not been so much interest in young females since psychologist Mary Pipher chronicled anorexics and suicide victims in her 1994 bestseller, Reviving Ophelia."--The Washington Post
"Provocative . . . Cathartic to any teen or parent trying to find company . . . it will sound depressingly familiar to any girl with a pulse."--Detroit Free Press
"Encourages girls to address one another when they feel angry or jealous, rather than engage in the rumor mill."--Chicago Tribune
"Peels away the smiley surfaces of adolescent female society to expose one of girlhood's dark secrets: the vicious psychological warfare waged every day in the halls of our . . . schools."--San Francisco Chronicle
Praise for Odd Girl Out
"[Simmons] peels away the smiley surfaces of adolescent female society to expose one of girlhood's dark secrets: the vicious psychological warfare waged every day in the halls of our middle schools and high schools."-San Francisco Chronicle
"This is the book we have been waiting for. . . . Simmons has given voice to the girls who struggle everyday with friendships. She has uncovered a hidden world of aggression that unfolds behind adults' backs."-Susan Wellman, president of The Ophelia Project
"Thought-provoking . . . Probes the emotional underpinnings of girls' aggression."-Newsweek
"A heartening book, and tonic for these politically polarized times."
"She's motivated by the victim's pain, but also aware of the pain of the perpetrators and believes they can change."
"Revealing.... Young adults will find support, direction, and even a community in their peers' words."<br>
In 2002, Odd Girl Out
awakened us to a hidden, hot-button subject: bullying among girls. It helped millions of girls, parents, counselors, and teachers deal with a devastating problem and elevated the nation's consciousness. Now bullying expert Rachel Simmons returns to her groundbreaking work and updates it for the newest generation of girls.
Rooted in the extensive expertise she has developed since first publication as well as new research, Simmons ushers the book into the twenty-first century with a new chapter on digital technology: how girls use technology and how it exacerbates existing girl dynamics. Working directly from her experiences with schools and families over the past decade, she brings us new classroom initiatives, policy suggestions, and step-by-step suggestions for parents. With illuminating, timely additions, this definitive resource is made even more relevant, still shining a powerful spotlight on the most pressing social issues continuously facing our girls.
Dirty looks and taunting notes are just a few examples of girl bullying that girls and women have long suffered through silently and painfully. With this book Rachel Simmons elevated the nation's consciousness and has shown millions of girls, parents, counselors, and teachers how to deal with this devastating problem. Poised to reach a wider audience in paperback, including the teenagers who are its subject, Odd Girl Out
puts the spotlight on this issue, using real-life examples from both the perspective of the victim and of the bully.
When it was first published, Odd Girl Out
awakened us to a hidden, hot-button subject: bullying among girls. It elevated our consciousness and helped millions of girls, parents, counselors, and teachers deal with a devastating problem. Now bullying expert Rachel Simmons updates her groundbreaking work for the newest generation of girls. Rooted in her extensive experience with girls since Odd Girl Out
first appeared, as well as up-to-date research, Simmons offers a new chapter on technology: she focuses on cyberbullying and what parents and teachers can do to deal with the problem, and how girls can avoid drama online. After working directly with schools and families over the past decade, she also brings us new classroom initiatives and step-by-step suggestions for parents. With illuminating, timely additions, this definitive resource is now even more relevant, still shining a powerful spotlight on the most pressing social issues facing our girls.
When boys act out, get into fights, or become physically aggressive, we can't avoid noticing their bad behavior. But it is easy to miss the subtle signs of aggression in girls--the dirty looks, the taunting notes, or the exclusion from the group-that send girls home crying.
In Odd Girl Out, Rachel Simmons focuses on these interactions and provides language for the indirect aggression that runs through the lives and friendships of girls. These exchanges take place within intimate circles--the importance of friends and the fear of losing them is key. Without the cultural consent to express their anger or to resolve their conflicts, girls express their aggression in covert but damaging ways. Every generation of women can tell stories of being bullied, but Odd Girl Out explores and explains these experiences for the first time.
Journalist Rachel Simmons sheds light on destructive patterns that need our attention. With advice for girls, parents, teachers, and even school administrators, Odd Girl Out is a groundbreaking work that every woman will agree is long overdue.
REVISED AND UPDATED
WITH NEW MATERIAL ON CYBERBULLYING AND
HELPING GIRLS HANDLE THE DANGERS OF LIFE ONLINE
When Odd Girl Out was first published, it became an instant bestseller and ignited a long-overdue conversation about the hidden culture of female bullying. Today the dirty looks, taunting notes, and social exclusion that plague girls friendships have gained new momentum in cyberspace.
In this updated edition, educator and bullying expert Rachel Simmons gives girls, parents, and educators proven and innovative strategies for navigating social dynamics in person and online, as well as brand new classroom initiatives and step-by-step parental suggestions for dealing with conventional bullying. With up-to-the-minute research and real-life stories, Odd Girl Out continues to be the definitive resource on the most pressing social issues facing girls today.
READING GROUP GUIDE AND TEACHERS GUIDE available at www.marinnerreadersguides.com
About the Author
RACHEL SIMMONS, best-selling author of Odd Girl Speaks Out
and The Curse of the Good Girl
, is an educator and cofounder of the Girls Leadership Institute. A Rhodes Scholar, she has appeared on Today
, and other major shows, including her own PBS special, and writes frequently for Teen Vogue
Table of Contents
Chapter One: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls 15
Chapter Two: Intimate Enemies 39
Chapter Three: The Truth Hurts 67
Chapter Four: Bff 2.0: Cyberbullying and Cyberdrama 103
Chapter Five: Shes All That 145
Chapter Six: The Bully in the Mirror 171
Chapter Seven: Popular 197
Chapter Eight: Resistance 219
Chapter Nine: Parents Speak 245
Chapter Ten: Helping Her through Drama, Bullying, and Everything in Between 269
Chapter Eleven: Raising Girls in a Digital Age 313
Chapter Twelve: The Road Ahead for Educators and Administrators 335
About The Book 397
About The Author 399
Discussion Questions 401
Tips To Further Enhance Your Reading of Odd Girl Out 405