Synopses & Reviews
The bestselling author of The Secret Lives of Wives offers a refreshingly straightforward guide to enjoying a long, satisfying sex life.
Women of the baby boomer generation know and trust Iris Krasnow as a writer who speaks candidly to the issues that concern them most. In the months following the publication of her most recent book, The Secret Lives of Wives, Krasnow addressed thousands of women, and she discovered that two subjects dominated her audiences conversations: sex and change. Whether women are worried about marriage and divorce or illness and death, theyre all asking: How do I handle the shifts in my sexuality caused by these events?” Sex After . . . holds the answers to everything from regaining sexual confidence after childbirth and breast cancer to navigating the dating scene in senior communities.
As with all of Krasnows books since her New York Times bestseller Surrendering to Marriage, the narrative is driven by real womens stories: raw, intimate, and, most importantly, true. Prescriptive, emancipating, and insightful, Sex After . . . addresses a range of circumstances, including what happens:
- When you or your spouse doesnt want sex anymore
- After cancer, amputation, PTSD, or another illness maims the body
- If you come out of the closet at middle age
- When your marriage is damaged by adultery
- If youre dating again after twenty-five years with the same sexual partner
- When your husband is addicted to Viagra
Filled with edgy and honest stories of carnal challenge and triumph from women of all backgrounds and life stages, Sex After . . . is Krasnows signature take on Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Sex but Were Afraid to Askduring all of lifes passages. Krasnow is a media and lecture tour favorite, and readerswhether in the heat of an initial cant-eat-cant-sleep attraction or rounding the corner to their sixtieth anniversarywill applaud her eye-opening perspectives on the one issue that can change lives for better or worse like nothing else.
"A wife of 23 years and mother of four grown sons, Krasnow (Surrendering to Marriage) advises wives that if they care about their families they 'should find a way to make their marriage work.' To this end, Krasnow has compiled the strategies for marital commitment of more than 200 women from across America who range in ethnicity, economic status, level of education, age when they married (from 15 to 70 years). Several know the self-affirming value of separate vacations and passions: Gail spends summers solo, painting in Italy, returning energized. Likewise, empty-nester Tracey, who has wonderful memories of her childhood sails with her father, became a yacht salesperson. Shelley turned infidelity to her advantage: her husband's affair with her best friend reinvigorated her marriage rather than destroying it Shauna compartmentalizes her life: because her husband, a good father and provider, is uninterested in sex, she has a landscaper boyfriend who loves sex. Perhaps the best advice comes from a Bengali in an arranged marriage who says women have to take responsibility for their own happiness. Although often trite, overwritten, and unfocused, this is also a spirited, frequently perceptive work that aims to fix marriages by empowering wives. (Oct.)" Publishers Weekly Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.
"At first this book terrified me: another submission and sacrifice marriage manual for wives? Instead Iris Krasnow delivers astonishing candor, realistic compassion, and invaluable wisdom when it comes to how paradoxically infuriating and rewarding long-term marriages can be. The best book on marriage ever." Leslie Morgan Steiner
“In this breathtaking book The Secret Lives of Wives,
Iris Krasnow opens a window into the inner world of women whose unique courage and vision has enabled them to find relationship happiness over the long term. With wit and wisdom, she thoughtfully tells their stories and then fills the reader with brilliant ideas and concepts to apply to their own lives. This is as much of a men’s book as it was written by and for women.”
Dr. Bill Cloke
“Iris Krasnow has managed to demystify the workings of long-term marriages by confirming the mysterious uniqueness of each one. The secret, she finds, lies in the way two people negotiate their own personal amalgam of companionship and sex, compromise and disappointment, lust and tenderness, trust and lies. The challenge for the rest of us is to do the same.”
Suzanne Braun Levine
“She whips up a spirited, enlightening cocktail of comfort, support and grace. Fulfilling and well-structured.” Kirkus Reviews
“One of Ten Titles to Pick Up Now. ‘Boyfriends with boundaries,’ separate summers, and other therapeutic strategies for maintaining wedded bliss over the long haul.” O, The Oprah Magazine
"[Krasnow] alternates well-researched passages full of relevant statistics and quotes with frank stories about sex after major life events such as childbirth, illness, infidelity, and more...Those skeptical of Krasnow's assertion that, in the realm of sex, 'the 70s are the new 40s' surely will change their minds after reading this lusty litany"
"[Krasnow] is a knowledgeable guide who shows great respect to the variety of life circumstances and aims to put readers at ease...there is osmething relatable for everyone and many opportunities to gain new knowledge as one moves through life."
"A nuanced, revelatory account of the role of sexual freedom in modern intimacy"
"We think that sex is eternal but in fact our ideas on sex do change with the decades. Sex After… is full of comforting information about these changes. A book that will be read and reread with gratitude."
—Erica Jong, New York Times bestselling author of Fear of Flying
“This book will start conversations that need to be had, and discussions about female sexual health and pleasure that need to be better understood. Some of the best and most practical advice comes from those who have been there. I also know change to, and in, our sex lives is inevitable and that women want to know what other women really do to recreate their intimate and sexual landscape. Part validation, part guide, part supportive girlfriend, Sex After... is your close girlfriends in book form sharing the real goods—and I mean real goods—on what they did and do.”
—Lou Paget, author of The Great Lover Playbook and AASECT Certified Sex Educator
Praise for The Secret Lives of Wives
"One of Ten Titles to Pick Up Now. ‘Boyfriends with boundaries, separate summers, and other therapeutic strategies for maintaining wedded bliss over the long haul." — O, the Oprah Magazine
"At first this book terrified me: another submission and sacrifice marriage manual for wives? Instead Iris Krasnow delivers astonishing candor, realistic compassion, and invaluable wisdom when it comes to how paradoxically infuriating and rewarding long-term marriages can be. The best book on marriage ever." — Leslie Morgan Steiner
"In this breathtaking book, The Secret Lives of Wives, Iris Krasnow opens a window into the inner world of women whose unique courage and vision has enabled them to find relationship happiness over the long term. With wit and wisdom, she thoughtfully tells their stories and then fills the reader with brilliant ideas and concepts to apply to their own lives. This is as much of a mens book as it was written by and for women." — Dr. Bill Cloke
"Iris Krasnow has managed to demystify the workings of long-term marriages by confirming the mysterious uniqueness of each one. The secret, she finds, lies in the way two people negotiate their own personal amalgam of companionship and sex, compromise and disappointment, lust and tenderness, trust and lies. The challenge for the rest of us is to do the same." — Suzanne Braun Levine
"She whips up a spirited, enlightening cocktail of comfort, support and grace. Fulfilling and well-structured." — Kirkus Reviews
A bestselling, groundbreaking author investigates wives who thrive, sharing their uncensored strategies for staying married.
America’s high divorce rate is well known. But little attention has been paid to the flip side: couples who creatively manage to build marriages that are lasting longer than we ever thought possible. What’s the secret? To find out, bestselling journalist Iris Krasnow interviewed more than two hundred wives whose marriages have survived for fifteen to seventy years.
In raw, candid, sometimes titillating stories, Krasnow’s cast of wise women give voice to the truth about marriage and the importance of maintaining a strong sense of self apart from the relationship. Some spend summers separately from their partners. Some make time for wine with the girls. One septuagenarian has a recurring date with an old flame from high school. In every case, the marriage operates on many tracks, giving both spouses license to pursue the question “Who am I apart from my marriage?”
Krasnow’s goal is to give women permission to create their own marriages at any age. Marital bliss is possible, she says, if each partner is blissful apart from the other. For anyone who wants to stay married and stay sane, this is the book to read!
About the Author
Iris Krasnow is the author of New York Times bestseller Surrendering to Marriage, as well as Surrendering to Motherhood, Surrendering to Yourself, and I Am My Mother’s Daughter. A longtime journalism professor at American University, she has appeared on numerous national shows, ranging from Oprah and Good Morning America to Today and All Things Considered. She lives in Maryland with her husband and four sons.