Synopses & Reviews
A sisterhood of support for coping with infertility"This compelling and insightful book will be much appreciated by women and men experiencing infertility. When You're Not Expecting is an important antidote to the top-down medical protocols that many have experienced."
--Ramona Faith Oswald, Ph.D., 2010 Program Chair of the National Council on Family Relations
Too many women face the unexpected diagnosis of infertility without the support they need to survive and thrive during months (or years) of treatment options, difficult decisions, and emotional turmoil. For more than twenty years, Constance H. Shapiro-celebrated therapist, author, and professor-has dedicated her practice to helping women and couples deal with infertility. In When You're Not Expecting, she combines her wisdom with the personal stories, creative solutions, and revelations of over 200 women and couples diagnosed with infertility.
This book is for you if
- Your inability to get pregnant is causing you confusion and anxiety.
- You can't figure out who to tell about your infertility (or how much to confide).
- You are not getting the support you need.
- Your sex life has lost its zing now that you have calendars and ovulation kits on your bedside table.
- You are single or in a lesbian relationship and hoping to conceive.
- You have experienced pregnancy loss.
- More and more, your life and every decision you make seem to revolve around your infertility.
Synopsis
Surviving the challenges of infertilityOften enduring years of heartache, couples with infertility number over 7.3 million. Enduring the daunting difficulties of treatment is something few women are prepared for. Based on the personal stories of 200 women determined to overcome infertility, this surprisingly upbeat survivors' guide gives the kind of hard-won wisdom essential to making it through the process. Not only does the book detail coping strategies, it also presents tips for strengthening stressed relationships and addresses the unique needs of single women and lesbians.
An essential guide for women and couples, friends and family, and health care providers and therapists, this book offers the solace and strength needed to prevail even after years of struggle.
- Written by a therapist, consultant, and public speaker dedicated to the study of infertility and its emotional impact
- Other titles by Shapiro: When Part of the Self Is Lost and Infertility and Pregnancy Loss
For any woman or couple who feel as if they're facing infertility alone, When You're Not Expecting is a must-have book.
http://connieshapiro13.blogspot.com/
About the Author
Constance Hoenk Shapiro, M.S.W., Ph.D. is a therapist, author, university professor, consultant, and public speaker dedicated to the study of infertility and its emotional impact on individuals and couples. She is a founding member of the Central New York chapter of RESOLVE and has been a member of the National Association of Social Workers and the Council on Social Work Education for over 30 years. She is a professor of Family Studies and Social Work at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign.
Table of Contents
Acknowledgments.Introduction.
Chapter 1: Infertility: The Journey Begins.
Infertility Testing.
Seeking Help from an Infertility Specialist.
Choosing an Infertility Clinic.
Communicating with Your Partner and Confiding in Others.
Would a Support Group or Therapist Help?
Learning to Deal with Infertility.
Chapter 2: The Club: On the Outside Looking In.
Friends and Coworkers in The Club.
Family Members in The Club.
Creative Coping.
Getting Support from Club Members.
Chapter 3: Emotional Overload: Staying Together through Infertility.
Husbands.
Lesbian Partners.
Chapter 4: The Waiting Game: When Life Is on Hold.
Waiting.
Not Taking On New Challenges.
Infertility and Your Job.
The Financial Crunch.
Considering Adoption or Surrogacy.
Chapter 5: Scheduled Sex: When Making Love Becomes Hard Work.
Infertility and Your Sex Life.
Seeking Counseling for Your Sex Life.
Chapter 6: Celebrations and Special Events: Coping with Gatherings.
Baby Showers.
Religious Rituals.
Holidays.
Family Celebrations.
Dealing with Gatherings on Your Own Terms.
Chapter 7: Another Shoulder to Lean On: Support Groups and Therapists.
In-Clinic Support Groups.
Community Support Groups.
Counselors and Therapists.
The Counseling Experience.
Chapter 8: Pregnancy Loss: A Shattered Dream.
Types of Fetal Loss.
Grief, Guilt, Regret, and Anger.
Reactions of Family and Friends.
Early Loss.
Loss after the First Trimester.
Loss in a Multiple Pregnancy.
Stillbirth.
Your Partner's Experience of Pregnancy Loss.
Chapter 9: Achieving Pregnancy: An Emotional Roller Coaster.
Why Your Pregnancy Feels Different from Others'.
The Many Reactions to Pregnancy.
Prenatal Testing.
Emotions in the First Trimester.
Emotions in the Second Trimester.
Emotions in the Third Trimester.
Unanticipated Complications.
Post-birth Concerns.
Chapter 10: Ending Treatment: When Enough Is Enough.
Finances.
Time Disruptions.
Clinic Accessibility.
Work Performance.
Statistical Odds or a Poor Medical Prognosis.
Emotional Issues.
Letting Go.
Moving On.
Chapter 11: Different Dreams: Opening New Doors to Life.
Adoption.
Surrogacy.
Child-free Living.
Epilogue: The Legacy of Infertility.
The Aftermath of Infertility.
The Challenges of Living Child Free.
Re-evaluating Relationships.
Your Long Journey.
Resources.
Index.