Synopses & Reviews
From the sneakily successful travel series with over one million copies in print, here is the guide to help travelers gain a foothold in Deutschland. Learn to distinguish between Mettwurst, Fleischwurst, Blutwurst, Schinkenwurst, Touristenwurst, Pinkelwurst, and Zungenwurst. Praise beer like the cognoscenti: "This Malz has a strong oak flavor with a faint almond backwash" and "The tanner, curvaceous Rauchbier displays a fine set of bubbles." Critique Bavarian castles, torment skinheads, and discover all the accepted excuses for backing out of a polka evening.
From the finer points of cultural exchange, such as discussing the cinema ("Why must there be action of any kind in a film? Hollywood's insistence on plot is ridiculous") to making friends in the disco ("I love your black boots/pants/shirt/jacket/hat/lipstick"), this book will make sure no German puts one uber on you again. It's on the Mark.
Synopsis
KNOWING THE WURSTS
Was für ein Tier ist das?
Which animal was this?
Welcher Teil?
Which part?
Bitte zeigen Sie mir die Stelle an Ihren Köper.
Please just point to the place on your own body.
Hmm. Das sieht mir nicht besonders schmackhaft/gesund aus.
Hmm. That doesn't look very tasty/healthful.
Habe ich erwähnt, dab ich mich entschlossen habe, Vegetarier zu werden?
Did I mention that I've decided to become a vegetarian?
About the Author
Howard Tomb is the author of the Wicked Travel books. He also writes for the Sunday Travel Section of the New York Times.
Table of Contents
WELCOME TO GERMANY- Get a Grip on German…5
- Pronunciation Guide…6
- Talk in the Provinces…7
- Linguistic Disclaimer and Exculpatory Protestation…7
ACCOMODATION, FOOD, AND DRINK AND DRINK- Hotel Existence…8
- History in Beer…10
- Beer Hall Small Talk…12
- Beer Connoisseurship…13
- A Visit to Blitz…15
- Your Oktoberfest Emergency…16
- Down and Dirty in the Ratskeller…17
- How to Become a German Dishwasher…19
DAILY LIFE- The Cost of Money…21
- Absolute Wursts…22
- The Wurst of the Wursts…23
- Phone Call for Mr. Kafka…24
- Post Communist…25
- Shopping for Laughs…26
- You and the Swiss Army Knife…28
GETTING AROUND- Surviving the Autobahn…29
- Road Curses and Fines…30
- Road Signs…31
- The Policeman's Beat…32
- Swerve and Protect…34
- Socialism Through Automobiles…35
- Confessions of a Sinner…36
- Mid-Morning Express…37
- Mystery Train…38
- The Spirit of the Red Baron…40
- The Front Lines…41
SIGHTSEEING- Grimm Tales of the Black Forest…42
- It's All Happening at the Berlin Zoo…43
- Castle Critique…44
- Crib Sheet to Major German Myths…45
- The Pretty Good Outdoors…48
ENTERTAINMENT AND NIGHTLIFE- How to Pick Up a Rhine Maiden…50
- Man or Superman…51
- Anarchy Rules…52
- The Words of Love and Pastry…54
- Mix & Match Musical Commentary…56
- The Gallant Duelist…58
- Escape from Oompa…59
- Surviving German Romanticism…60
BUSINESS- Magic Mountain of Marks…61
- Promptness Hints…62
- Autogesprache…63
- The Inevitable Thank-You Note…64