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Chelsea P
, April 25, 2014
(view all comments by Chelsea P)
The thing about SEX AND VIOLENCE is that it’s magic. I don’t know if the book is made of magic, or if magic somehow pours out of the author, but the result is this: you will be reading along, totally swept up in some conversation the characters are having, just having a grand old time, and then BAM! You’ll be hit with a line, just ONE LINE, out of NOWHERE, that is deep and profound and leaves you spinning in circles, and you will look up from the page, and get lost in your own thoughts for about ten minutes, thinking about that line and what it means and how it changes things and maybe even your life.
Seriously.
I can’t even pinpoint how many times this happened while reading SEX AND VIOLENCE (nor do I want to, and thus, spoil the sense of discovery you’ll feel upon reading), but for those who’ve read the book and are curious, I will vaguely reference a couple of my favorite lines:
The part about sex being luxurious for girls: I NEVER thought of things this way, and it was at once funny and profoundly sad, from a boy’s point of view, to have things laid out in those specific terms. To have the idea that sex is mostly fun for guys, and girls are the ones who have to worry about a lot of things, totally flipped on its head… Wow. It really struck a cord with me. Because I have thought about how, growing up, guys often think girls have all the power, and girls think guys have all the power, and really nobody feels like they have the power, and how sad that is, but I never thought of it in this specific way, and thank you Ms. Mesrobian for making me see things differently. This is my favorite thing about reading, when someone surprises me, changes my mind. Broadens my perspective.
Yes.
The other line (out of many) I really loved was the one about Lana rolling over and expecting to be petted, while Baker had places to be, and how interesting that is, how two people will be so different in sexual situations, and, specifically, why? … I mean, what causes one person to be almost entirely submissive and another to be aggressive? Is it personal? Psychological? Society? Upbringing?
Something else entirely?
This is the beauty of SEX AND VIOLENCE. Mesrobian never tells you what to think. She just gives you the building blocks to get there on your own. Like with Evan: Evan talks about himself as this fairly manipulative, very calculating guy who’s always scamming on chicks. But is his perception correct? When we think about Evan with Collette, or Mandy, or Baker (or whomever), how manipulative is he?
When Evan blames himself for what happens early on in the book, is he actually at fault?
Is the dichotomy of Good Evan and Dirtbag Evan accurate, or are they unrealistic extremes?
I’m not giving any answers here; in fact, I’d love your thoughts. I think there’s more than one answer. But I think Evan’s perception of himself vs. his actions may be the most fascinating aspect of an already fascinating book. It made me think about the way boys perceive themselves: specifically, the way Evan perceived the desirous aspects of himself as bad, dirty, dangerous, as if Good Evan was the human façade he wore during the day, and Dirtbag Evan was the uncontrollable werewolf he turned into at night.
And what does that mean for a boy trying to come to terms with his own desires, both physical and emotional?
What does that mean for anyone trying to come to terms with their desires, in a world that only frames those desires as dangerous or bad?
I seriously feel like I could go on forever with all these questions, but instead, I will leave you with this:
SEX AND VIOLENCE is amazing. Read it. Think about it. Come and talk to me.
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