I rushed to the cafe and was relieved to see my friend, the cook
, was still alive. Apparently he showed up at Pravda and the guy was there waiting for his hot mystery date (me). My friend and the three cops, with hands on their guns, approached him at the bar and he remained very calm and they all sat down to talk. He told them he would either produce the whole $25,000 or the liquor license by this Friday evening. Sadly, that's after my tenure as guest-blogger at Powell's is over, so you'll have to contact me on my website
to find out what happens. My friend and the cops followed him home in a cop car and actually went into his apartment with him to verify he lived where he said he lived.
There at the cafe, I ran into this girl who used to be one of my writing students but now she's an intuitive with a business card that she handed to me. She had to drop out of my writing workshop on Tuesday nights because that was the night the women's-only sex addicts anonymous meeting was held and that was the only meeting she could go to because she was tired of going to the other sex addicts anonymous meetings because there was always at least one man jerking off in his seat the whole time. I said, "What the hell is an intuitive?" She said it was a kind of psychic. Since my Mac computer is such a piece of crap that it's still broken, and I couldn't write anyway, I hired her to do a session in one of the booths. She said that Mike Figgis (Leaving Las Vegas) was definitely not going to make Going Down, even though the producers who hired him just reviewed the option. She looked over my shoulder into space and her eyes spontaneously filled with tears, and she said, "I just feel so sad when I think of him." She said Little Stalker will get made and come out in 2009 and Going Down will come out two years later. She said the director who's going to make Little Stalker is a woman with sort of frosted Martha Stewart hair and is bringing in a male producer. There is a female director who has a male producer who I'm entering into negotiation with to make Little Stalker but I've never met her. I'm supposed to meet her at her New York premier next Thursday and now I'm dying to see if she has Martha Stewart hair. She also said she's positive my baby (I'm pregnant) is going to be a girl, she knows a great cleaning lady I should hire, and I was teaching way too much and I had to get rid of some of my students, because I told her about a dream I had that one of my students, an older man, was in my bed and said, "Thank you for letting me sleep over after the workshop," and I didn't know how to tell him I really didn't want him to do that again. She made a chart and made me rate each one of my students from one to ten under the categories of 'Annoying', 'Niceness', and 'Talent' and based on their scores told me which ones I had to get rid of. I have to say, I really enjoyed that. She said Laura Day, the head intuitive who had trained her, was giving a talk tonight at Barnes & Noble and I had to go.
Then I checked my email and I had three ? one from a famous actress saying she really wanted to direct Going Down and the other was from the student I'd had the dream about, telling me he couldn't come back to the workshop because of his work. The best news of all was an email from the intuitive herself saying the talk at Barnes & Noble was canceled because the head intuitive was in LA at a premiere with Demi Moore and Jennifer Aniston. So I didn't have to go! Tomorrow I'm going to find out if she was right about it being a girl, so you have to tune in then.
÷ ÷ ÷
Jennifer Belle is the author of Going Down, High Maintenance, and Little Stalker. She lives in New York City.