Synopses & Reviews
Every year, more than a million women worldwide are diagnosed with breast cancer. They are shocked, depressed, and terrified—and they shouldn’t have to fight this battle on their own. They are going to need support from their families and close friends, and in particular from husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and other men in their lives. But as brave and strong as those men want to be, they too are facing what may be the challenge of a lifetime—and they are going to need help. Based on the author’s personal experiences and extensive research, Stand by Her is both a practical guide and an uplifting, inspirational work.
Advance Praise for Stand By Her
“John Anderson takes the reader through the terrifying, frustrating, and unfamiliar world of a woman’s breast cancer diagnosis with humor, frankness, and practical advice gleaned from experts and a lot of personal experience. Anyone supporting a loved one with any kind of cancer will benefit from this book, but it should be required reading for the men in the life of a breast cancer patient, whether they be husbands, fathers, brothers, ex-spouses, sons, or close friends.”
— Hala Moddelmog, President and CEO, Susan G. Komen for the Cure®
“This book is an amazing resource. Informative, funny, moving, and always brutally frank, it is a must for men (and women!) trying to understand the world of breast cancer.” — Barron H. Lerner, MD, Professor of Medicine, Columbia University, and author, The Breast Cancer Wars
“Stand by Her is an accurate and heartfelt description of the emotions and feelings a spouse goes through during discovery and treatment of breast cancer. If you have already gone through the process, it makes you feel like you’re not alone. If you are about to, it will give you an excellent understanding of what to expect.” — Frank Fiorina, husband of cancer survivor Carly Fiorina, ex-CEO, Hewlett-Packard
John W. Anderson is an Emmy-nominated director for Lifetime Television’s “Stop Breast Cancer for Life” campaign and an award-winning writer whose work has appeared in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, the Nation, and many other publications. He has helped his mother, wife, sister, and a close friend in their battles against breast cancer. He lives in Roanoke, Virginia.
Review
CONTENTS
Foreword by Ruth Oratz, MD, FACP vii
Acknowledgments xi
Introduction 1
Chapter 1
The Abyss: ‘‘I Have Breast Cancer’’ (Black) 7
Chapter 2
Breast Cancer War: Assembling Her Armed Forces (Gray) 41
Chapter 3
The Battle Begins: Surgery (Purple) 83
Chapter 4
Chemotherapy: The Shot Felt Round the World (Red) 113
Chapter 5
Warning: The Radioactive Emotional Fallout (Blue) 155
Chapter 6
The New Normal: Rebuilding Her Life and Yours (Green) 181
Chapter 7
The Great Unknown: Will It Return? (White) 215
Chapter 8
The War Is Over: Five Years Later (Pink) 239
Web Resources 245
Index 249
About the Author 257
“With wit and openness, [author] writes about women's feelings and how men should respond…excellent title for the males…women will gain perspective as well.” -- Library Journal
“…a guideline, a war strategy, a resource guide and an emotional support system eloquently...that should be read by every man.” -- Our Health magazine
"No woman should have to face this diagnosis alone. Stand by Her gives a man the tools he needs to be a stand-up guy." -- Energy Times
“…wealth of insight as he guides men to an understanding of the meaningful role they can… play in a woman's treatment and…recovery.“-- New York Daily News
“…very compelling read…a precious gift and powerful weapon in the fight against breast cancer. Well done, Mr Anderson!” -- Help4NewMoms.com
“A great read for anyone…just learning someone they love has breast cancer.” -- Banton Rouge Parents Magazine
“…this book is wonderful!...I'm so happy that Anderson has put together this great book for other men going through the same thing.” -- MomontheRandom .com
“This is the MUST-READ book for men.” -- An Island Life
Selected by Wall Street Journal as one of 2009 best health books. “…walks men through all the physical and emotional challenges women will face during treatment…”
"...an invaluable guide to support. A must for both health collections and personal consultation.” -- The Midwest Book Review
"...pages...seep with joy and remorse, humor, comfort and wisdom from one who has seen the battle from the front lines.”-- Roanoker
Selected by Library Journal as one of the Best Consumer Health Books of 2009
Review
“…page after page of sound practical advice and empathic counsel…make Anderson’s book an undisputable choice for a place on the shortlist of guides for caregivers.” -- Foreword magazine
Review
“With wit and openness, [author] writes about women's feelings and how men should respond…excellent title for the males…women will gain perspective as well.” -- Library Journal
Review
“…a guideline, a war strategy, a resource guide and an emotional support system eloquently...that should be read by every man.” -- Our Health magazine
Review
"No woman should have to face this diagnosis alone. Stand by Her gives a man the tools he needs to be a stand-up guy." -- Energy Times
Review
“…wealth of insight as he guides men to an understanding of the meaningful role they can… play in a woman's treatment and…recovery.“-- New York Daily News
Review
“…very compelling read…a precious gift and powerful weapon in the fight against breast cancer. Well done, Mr Anderson!” -- Help4NewMoms.com
Review
“A great read for anyone…just learning someone they love has breast cancer.” -- Banton Rouge Parents Magazine
Review
“…this book is wonderful!...I'm so happy that Anderson has put together this great book for other men going through the same thing.” -- MomontheRandom .com
Review
“This is the MUST-READ book for men.” -- An Island Life
Review
Selected by Wall Street Journal as one of 2009 best health books. “…walks men through all the physical and emotional challenges women will face during treatment…”
Review
"...an invaluable guide to support. A must for both health collections and personal consultation.” -- The Midwest Book Review
Review
"...pages...seep with joy and remorse, humor, comfort and wisdom from one who has seen the battle from the front lines.”-- Roanoker
Review
Selected by Library Journal as one of the Best Consumer Health Books of 2009
Synopsis
Laura Landro, Wall Street Journal’s “Informed Patient” columnist, has selected STAND BY HER as one of 2009’s best health books, and a recommended read for the New Year.
Selected by Library Journal as one of the Best Consumer Health Books of 2009
Scared. Shocked. Depressed. These words describe the more than one million women worldwide who are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. But they also apply to the husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and friends to whom cancer sufferers turn for support. Stand by Her is written to help these men be the very best supporters they can be, combining solid practical advice with emotional guidance—based both on the author’s personal experience and his extensive research.
Offering insight into medical, psychological, family, sexual, and financial issues, Stand by Her takes the reader through:
• Interpreting and handling the initial diagnosis
• Making preparations for treatment, from finding doctors and hospitals to organizing family members into an effective team
• Advising her while recognizing that treatment decisions are hers and hers alone
• Maintaining a sense of normalcy in everyday life
• Preparing emotionally and practically when the prognosis is not good
The book also provides an exhaustive section of print, online, and other resources for patients and caregivers.
One day the war against breast cancer will be won. Until then, women need their men to help them fight. This landmark
book will help any man overcome the fear and frustration of dealing with the disease, and arm him with the knowledge and resources he needs to Stand by Her.
Synopsis
Laura Landro,
Wall Street Journal's "Informed Patient" columnist, has selected STAND BY HER as one of 2009's best health books, and a recommended read for the New Year.
Selected by
Library Journal as one of the Best Consumer Health Books of 2009
Scared. Shocked. Depressed. These words describe the more than one million women worldwide who are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. But they also apply to the husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and friends to whom cancer sufferers turn for support.
Stand by Her is written to help these men be the very best supporters they can be, combining solid practical advice with emotional guidance--based both on the author's personal experience and his extensive research.
Offering insight into medical, psychological, family, sexual, and financial issues,
Stand by Her takes the reader through:
- Interpreting and handling the initial diagnosis
- Making preparations for treatment, from finding doctors and hospitals to organizing family members into an effective team
- Advising her while recognizing that treatment decisions are hers and hers alone
- Maintaining a sense of normalcy in everyday life
- Preparing emotionally and practically when the prognosis is not good
The book also provides an exhaustive section of print, online, and other resources for patients and caregivers.
One day the war against breast cancer will be won. Until then, women need their men to help them fight. This landmark
book will help any man overcome the fear and frustration of dealing with the disease, and arm him with the knowledge and resources he needs to Stand by Her.
Synopsis
Laura Landro, Wall Street Journal’s “Informed Patient” columnist, has selected STAND BY HER as one of 2009’s best health books, and a recommended read for the New Year.
Selected by Library Journal as one of the Best Consumer Health Books of 2009
Scared. Shocked. Depressed. These words describe the more than one million women worldwide who are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. But they also apply to the husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and friends to whom cancer sufferers turn for support. Stand by Her is written to help these men be the very best supporters they can be, combining solid practical advice with emotional guidance—based both on the author’s personal experience and his extensive research.
Offering insight into medical, psychological, family, sexual, and financial issues, Stand by Her takes the reader through:
• Interpreting and handling the initial diagnosis
• Making preparations for treatment, from finding doctors and hospitals to organizing family members into an effective team
• Advising her while recognizing that treatment decisions are hers and hers alone
• Maintaining a sense of normalcy in everyday life
• Preparing emotionally and practically when the prognosis is not good
The book also provides an exhaustive section of print, online, and other resources for patients and caregivers.
One day the war against breast cancer will be won. Until then, women need their men to help them fight. This landmark
book will help any man overcome the fear and frustration of dealing with the disease, and arm him with the knowledge and resources he needs to Stand by Her.
Synopsis
Laura Landro, Wall Street Journal’s “Informed Patient” columnist, has selected STAND BY HER as one of 2009’s best health books, and a recommended read for the New Year.
Scared. Shocked. Depressed. These words describe the more than one million women worldwide who are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. But they also apply to the husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and friends to whom cancer sufferers turn for support. Stand by Her is written to help these men be the very best supporters they can be, combining solid practical advice with emotional guidance—based both on the author’s personal experience and his extensive research.
Offering insight into medical, psychological, family, sexual, and financial issues, Stand by Her takes the reader through:
• Interpreting and handling the initial diagnosis
• Making preparations for treatment, from finding doctors and hospitals to organizing family members into an effective team
• Advising her while recognizing that treatment decisions are hers and hers alone
• Maintaining a sense of normalcy in everyday life
• Preparing emotionally and practically when the prognosis is not good
The book also provides an exhaustive section of print, online, and other resources for patients and caregivers.
One day the war against breast cancer will be won. Until then, women need their men to help them fight. This landmark
book will help any man overcome the fear and frustration of dealing with the disease, and arm him with the knowledge and resources he needs to Stand by Her.
About the Author
JOHN W. ANDERSON (Roanoke, VA) is an Emmy-nominated director for Lifetime Television’s “Stop Breast Cancer for Life” campaign and an award-winning writer whose work has appeared in The New York Times, Rolling Stone, The Nation, and many other publications. He has helped his mother, wife, sister, and a close friend in their battles against breast cancer.