Synopses & Reviews
andlt;Bandgt;No one should be left to grieve aloneandlt;/Bandgt; andlt;BRandgt; Even with the help of friends and family, grieving the death of a loved one can be a complex, sometimes overwhelming, process. andlt;Iandgt;The Mourning Handbookandlt;/Iandgt; is written as a companion to those mourners in need of practical and emotional assistance during the trying times before and after the death of a loved one. andlt;BRandgt; Having counseled thousands of people who have experienced loss, Helen Fitzgerald gives special attention to the complex emotions that can accompany especially traumatic situations, such as when a loved one has been murdered, when there have been multiple deaths, when a body has not been recovered, or when the mourner has been the inadvertent cause of death. andlt;BRandgt; Designed to conform to the special needs of the bereaved, andlt;Iandgt;The Mourning Handbookandlt;/Iandgt; is written and organized in an accessible style punctuated by real stories of people who have experienced every kind of loss. With many subchapters and cross references, it can be consulted for a specific problem or read at length.
Review
Earl A. Grollman author of andlt;Iandgt;Living When a Loved One Has Diedandlt;/Iandgt; I recommend andlt;Iandgt;The Mourning Handbookandlt;/Iandgt; to any reader in search of a path out of the wilderness of despair. It is a compass, pointing the way to recovery.
Synopsis
Helen Fitzgerald, author of The Grieving Child, has compiled a guide to help readers practically and emotionally grieve the death of loved ones. No one should be left to grieve alone. Even with the help of friends and family, grieving the death of a loved one can be a complex, sometimes overwhelming, process. The Mourning Handbook is written as a companion to those mourners in need of practical and emotional assistance during the trying times before and after the death of a loved one.
Having counseled thousands of people who have experienced loss, Helen Fitzgerald gives special attention to the complex emotions that can accompany especially traumatic situations, such as when a loved one has been murdered, when there have been multiple deaths, when a body has not been recovered, or when the mourner has been the inadvertent cause of death.
Designed to conform to the special needs of the bereaved, The Mourning Handbook is written and organized in an accessible style punctuated by real stories of people who have experienced every kind of loss. With many subchapters and cross references, it can be consulted for a specific problem or read at length.
About the Author
andlt;Bandgt;Helen Fitzgeraldandlt;/Bandgt; is the author of andlt;Iandgt;The Grieving Child: A Parent's Guide.andlt;/Iandgt; She is the coordinator of the first grief program in the nation established in a community mental health center (The Mt. Vernon Center for Community Mental Health in Springfield, Virginia). A certified death educator, Fitzgerald devoted herself to the field after the death of her husband left her a widow with four children. She lectures across the country on the subject. The success of her program has led to the creation of similar programs nationally. She lives in Fairfax, Virginia.
Table of Contents
andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;andlt;Iandgt;Contentsandlt;/Iandgt;andlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Iandgt;Forewordandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Before you Begin This Bookandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Introductionandlt;/Iandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 1 FACTS ABOUT GRIEFandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;1.1 Definitionsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Griefandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Mourningandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;1.2 When Does Grief Begin?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;1.3 How Long Does Grief Last?andlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Age of the Deceasedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Cause of Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Nature of Relationshipandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Other Events in One's Lifeandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Support Systemsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Resources One Can Commandandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;One's Coping Skillsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Sexual Differencesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;1.4 Does Grief End?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;1.5 Why Must You Express Your Grief?.andlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Understanding the Grief Processandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 2 PREPARING FOR A DEATHandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;2.1 The Diagnosisandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Only the Beginningandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;2.2 Visiting the Dyingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;2.3 Anticipatory Griefandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How Anticipatory Grief Can Be Helpfulandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Is Anticipatory Grief Not Helpful?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;2.4 When Death Comesandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Death Occurs in a Hospitalandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Death Occurs at Homeandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 3 FUNERAL PREPARATIONSandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;3.1 Why Have a Funeral?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;3.2 Planning the Funeralandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Cost Is a Factorandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Making the Funeral Meaningfulandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;3.3 Selecting a Cemeteryandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;3.4 Burialandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;What Happens to the Body After Burial?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Visiting the Graveandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How Often Should You Visit the Grave?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Thoughts Pertaining to the Headstoneandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;3.5 Cremationandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;3.6 Memorial Servicesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;3.7 Cenotaphsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;3.8 Disposing of Personal Belongingsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 4 MOURNING YOUR LOSSandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.1 Grief Is Unlike Other Life Experiencesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;4.2 Disbelief and Shockandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Some Ideas on How to Help Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.3 Denialandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Some Questions to Ask Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Ways That People Avoid Realityandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Yourself Deal with Denialandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Consult with a Professionalandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.4 Rage and Angerandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Anger Is a Powerful Emotionandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Does One Have to Express Anger?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Know Your Anger Historyandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Do You Know You Are Getting Angry?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Prioritizing the Things That Make You Angryandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Seek Professional Helpandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.5 Guilt or Regretsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Seek Professional Helpandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.6 Depressionandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Know Your Own Symptoms of Depressionandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Seek Professional Helpandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.7 Fearsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Be Concernedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.8 Panicandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;4.9 Physical Illness and Symptomsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Be Concernedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 5 CONTINUING REMINDERS OF YOUR LOSSandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;5.1 Public Holidaysandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Christmasandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Other Religious Holidaysandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Secular Holidaysandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;5.2 Special Family Occasionsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;5.3 Anniversariesandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Birthdaysandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Wedding Anniversariesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Special Anniversariesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;The First-Year Anniversary of the Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;5.4 Dreams, Nightmares, and "Visions"andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;5.5 Visiting the Cemeteryandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Be Concernedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;5.6 Revisiting Favorite Placesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;5.7 Unexpected Remindersandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 6 DIFFERENCES THAT MATTERandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;6.1 Old Ageandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.2 Long-term Illnessandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Suggestions for Those Dealing with AIDSandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;6.3 Sudden Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.4 Suicideandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.5 Murderandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.6 Extended Familyandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.7 Grandparentandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.8 Friendandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.9 Petandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.10 Siblingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.11 Parentandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;As an Adultandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;As a Childandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;6.12 Love Relationshipandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;6.13 Spouseandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;The Loneliness of Widowhoodandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;6.14 Childandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Abortionandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Grief as Part of Your Lifeandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 7 COMPLICATED GRIEFandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;7.1 Other Changes in Your Lifeandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Delayed Griefandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;7.2 Unusual Circumstancesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.3 Unintentional Acts and Far-Reaching Consequencesandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.4 Multiple Deathsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.5 Sudden Illness and Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.6 Violent Deathandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Accidental Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Suicideandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Murderandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;7.7 Questionable Deathsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.8 Shock of Discoveryandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.9 Hearing the Death Newsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.10 Witnessing a Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.11 Notorietyandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.12 When the Body Is Not Presentableandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.13 When There Is No Bodyandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.14 Secrets Discovered After Deathandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.15 "Unacceptable" Relationshipsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.16 Dependent Relationshipsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Spouseandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Adult Childandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;7.17 Conflicted Relationshipsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.18 Unfinished Businessandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.19 Substance Abuseandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.20 Replacement Childandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.21 Unusual Developmentsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.22 Missing Personsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;7.23 How to Help Yourselfandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Be Concernedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 8 UNRESOLVED CHILDHOOD GRIEF AND TRAUMAandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;8.1 What Is Unresolved Childhood Grief?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.2 No Detour Too Long to Avoid a Cemeteryandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.3 Ten Years of Not Talking About Itandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.4 The Girl Whose Father Killed Himselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.5 A Not-So-Funny Jokeandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.6 Problems in the Makingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.7 What Is Death-Related Trauma?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.8 Why Review Such Painful Memories?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.9 Where Do You Start?andlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Gathering Informationandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;8.10 Finding the Source of Your Griefandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Early Death Experienceandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;8.11 Other Things to Look Forandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;8.12 Restarting the Grief Processandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Recording Your Recollectionsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Booksandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Healing Old Woundsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Writingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Letter Writingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Drawingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Funeral Home and Cemetery Visitsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Symbolic Burialandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When to Be Concernedandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 9 THE ROAD TO RECOVERYandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;9.1 Helping Yourself Through Your Griefandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Dietandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Exerciseandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Restandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;9.2 You Know You Are Getting Better When...andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;9.3 New Relationshipsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When Do You Know You Are Ready?andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Where to Startandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;On Datingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;On Children and Datingandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;How to Help Your Childrenandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;On Sexualityandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;On AIDSandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;When a Relationship Breaks Upandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;On Remarriageandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Chapter 10 A FRIEND IN NEEDandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;10.1 Preparing Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.2 When Death Occursandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.3 Funeral Arrangementsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.4 Funeralsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.5 Emotional Helpandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Taking Care of Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Bandgt;10.6 Things to Avoidandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.7 Long-Term Helpandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.8 Writing a Letter of Condolenceandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;10.9 Delivering Death Newsandlt;/Bandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;By Telephoneandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;In Personandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Looking Out for Yourselfandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Iandgt;Epilogueandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Bibliographyandlt;/Iandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;General Griefandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Widowhoodandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Suicideandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Parent Griefandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Parent Death for Adult Childandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Childrenandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;For the Family When a Member is Seriously Illandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;For Family and Friendsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;The Death of a Petandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Dealing with Angerandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;For the Professionalandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Iandgt;Resourcesandlt;/Iandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Finding Professional Helpandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Support Groupsandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Death of a Childandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Suicideandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Death of a Spouseandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Death by Murderandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Death of a Petandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;Illness with Cancerandlt;BRandgt;andlt;BRandgt;andlt;Iandgt;Indexandlt;/Iandgt;