Synopses & Reviews
Go-to expert on gender identity, Schuyler Bailar, offers an essential, urgent guide that changes the conversation.
Anti-transgender legislation is being introduced in state governments around the United States in record-breaking numbers. Trans people are under attack in sports, healthcare, school curriculum, bathrooms, bars, and nearly every walk of life.
He/She/They clearly and compassionately addresses fundamental topics, from why being transgender is not a choice and why pronouns are important, to more complex issues including how gender-affirming healthcare can be lifesaving and why allowing trans youth to play sports is good for all kids. With a relatable narrative rooted in facts, science, and history, Schuyler helps restore common sense and humanity to a discussion that continues to be divisively coopted and deceptively politicized.
Schuyler Bailar didn't set out to be an activist, but his very public transition to the Harvard men's swim team put him in the spotlight. His choice to be open about his transition and share his experience has touched people around the world. His plain-spoken education has evolved into tireless advocacy for inclusion and collective liberation. In He/She/They, Schuyler uses storytelling and the art of conversation to give us the essential language and context of gender, meeting everyone where they are and paving the way for understanding, acceptance, and, most importantly: connection. He/She/They is more than a book on allyship; it also speaks to trans folks directly, answering the question, "does it get better?" with a resounding yes, celebrating radical trans joy. Myth-busting, affirming, compassionate, and fierce, He/She/They is a crucial, urgent — and lifesaving — book that forever changes the conversation about gender.
Understanding the realities of gender identities. In this remarkable book, Bailar, the first trans athlete to play a sport on an NCAA Division 1 men's team and now a prominent advocate for trans rights, reflects on his experiences as a trans man and explains how we might best comprehend and discuss gender identity. In four sections, the author provides definitions of critical concepts related to gender, recommendations about ways to discuss complex and sensitive issues, scientifically informed debunking of common misconceptions, and guidance about how trans individuals and their allies can successfully navigate the challenges of an often transphobic society. Along the way, Bailar astutely unpacks the assumptions informing key debates that have become flashpoints in the nation's culture wars: the appropriateness of surgery and hormone treatments for young people; the participation of trans individuals in sports; the politics of bathrooms; the significance of pronoun use; and the relationship between trans identities and mental illness. Among the many strengths of this book is the author's patient, informed unfolding of his arguments. Though his claims are obviously deeply held and passionately rendered, Bailar refrains from polemics and remains generous toward those who might disagree. Another key point is the author's linking of transphobia to other forms of prejudice and indictment of deep-seated cultural anxieties about gender and sexual orientation. Trans individuals, he writes, "are a threat because our very identities disrupt the most basic conventions of Western society: cis white patriarchal power — the system of oppression that has built and controlled this country since its inception...we know ourselves even when those in power say it is impossible for us to exist." Bailar's appeals for understanding could not be timelier, given the recent rise of anti-trans legislation as well as anti-trans violence. For those seeking such understanding, this is an invaluable resource. A wonderfully clear and convincing guide to comprehending and defending gender diversity.
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“A wonderfully clear and convincing guide to comprehending and defending gender diversity” Kirkus Reviews
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“A smart and accessible discussion of gender and sexuality.” Publisher's Weekly
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“He/She/They by Schuyler Bailar is an incredible book and resource for all who want to understand gender & transness based off of someone who has lived it. Schuyler is an activist, athlete, educator, and now writer! This book is informative, fabulous to read, and leaves the reader with information, joy and proactive ways to get involved in what is one of the most important human rights conversations of our time. I love this book & Schuyler, you will too!“ Jonathan Van Ness, New York Times bestselling author, podcaster, comedian, and television personality
About the Author
Schuyler Bailar (he/him) is an educator, author, and advocate. He is also the first transgender athlete to compete in any sport on an NCAA Division 1 men's team. Schuyler's exemplary work has earned him numerous honors including NYC Pride Grand Marshall, the Out 100, LGBTQ Nation's Instagram Advocate of the year, and the Harvard Varsity Director's Award. In addition to being one of the top LGBTQ+ educators and advocates, Schuyler is a leading DEI speaker and advisor who has been featured in countless media outlets. Schuyler also hosts the hit podcast "Dear Schuyler" on gender and culture and is the creator of the groundbreaking LaneChanger.com gender literacy online learning series. He holds a degree in Cognitive Neuroscience and Evolutionary Psychology from Harvard, and works in four research labs focusing in clinical psychology and public health.