Synopses & Reviews
My Wedding Dress explores the wedding outfit as a touchstone garment in womens lives. In the tradition of
Dropped Threads, this collection offers twenty-six true stories from well-known writers and fresh new literary voices. These are intimate stories about relationships; not just those between men and women, but between women and their mothers, friends and children. And, of course, with their wedding attire – a relationship that is sometimes simple, sometimes complex, but always fascinating in what it tells us about individual lives and aspirations.
Some of the tales are humorous – the bride whose skin is dyed fuchsia on her wedding night or the woman whose shopping-savvy aunt takes her to New Yorks garment district. Some are romantic – the woman who puts on her dress eight years after her wedding only to be caught by her husband when he comes home early from work or the quickie immigration wedding that turned into the real thing. Some are devastating – the bride who loses her mother to illness only days before her wedding or the woman whose mother tells of being kidnapped by her future husband. And some are revealing – the woman who wears her first wedding dress for her initiation ceremony into a convent and her second to marry her beloved; the dress that waited patiently in a shop window and then hidden in a box on a closet shelf; the same-sex wedding at age eighty; the thrift shop wedding dress that gets used for everything but a wedding. All are honest, personal and profoundly moving.
As Anne Laurel Carter explains in her introduction, the pieces “fell easily” into four categories, so thats how the book is organized. “Something Old” looks at how traditions like honouring ones ancestors affected wedding dress choices, from a grandmothers gift to a fathers old leather jacket, but also at how such traditions can play a role in ways you least expect. The pieces in “Something New” focus on dreams for the future, whether that means breaking away from the expectations of ones family or choosing/creating a wedding dress (and a future) on your own. In “Something Borrowed,” writers tell of all the reasons behind borrowing (or trying to borrow!) dresses, for whatever reason, and “Something Blue . . . Or Peach . . . Or Striped . . . Or Floral . . .” looks at exactly that–the non-traditional choices women have made, and why.
These stories re-create the range of emotions that are invested in dresses and wedding days: confidence, optimism, hesitation, fear, fury and hope. When you work away at the seams, even the simplest of wedding outfits reveals all manner of memories and meanings. And whether youve been married or not, the stories in My Wedding Dress will have you looking back with new eyes on your own life, and exploring what the phrase “my wedding dress” means to you.
Contributors to My Wedding Dress:
Joanne Arnott
Anita Rau Badami
Adwoa Badoe
Sandra Campbell
Lorna Crozier
Rebecca Cunningham
Laurie Elmquist
Alisa Gordaneer
Jessica Ruth Harris
Kathleen Boyle Hatcher
Rosemary Hood
Michele Landsberg
Mary T. Malone
Jenny Manzer
Ami McKay
Jane Munro
Margaret Goudie Parsons
Gianna Patriarca
Elyse Pomeranz
Edeet Ravel
Kerri Sakamoto
Ilana Stanger-Ross
Darla Tenold
Jamie Zeppa
Foreword by
Stevie Cameron
Afterword by
Amy Cameron
Edited by
and with contributions from
Susan Whelehan
and
Anne Laurel Carter
Synopsis
My Wedding Dress explores the wedding outfit as a touchstone garment in womens lives. In the tradition of
Dropped Threads, this collection offers twenty-six true stories from well-known writers and fresh new literary voices. These are intimate stories about relationships; not just those between men and women, but between women and their mothers, friends and children. And, of course, with their wedding attire - a relationship that is sometimes simple, sometimes complex, but always fascinating in what it tells us about individual lives and aspirations.
Some of the tales are humorous - the bride whose skin is dyed fuchsia on her wedding night or the woman whose shopping-savvy aunt takes her to New Yorks garment district. Some are romantic - the woman who puts on her dress eight years after her wedding only to be caught by her husband when he comes home early from work or the quickie immigration wedding that turned into the real thing. Some are devastating - the bride who loses her mother to illness only days before her wedding or the woman whose mother tells of being kidnapped by her future husband. And some are revealing - the woman who wears her first wedding dress for her initiation ceremony into a convent and her second to marry her beloved; the dress that waited patiently in a shop window and then hidden in a box on a closet shelf; the same-sex wedding at age eighty; the thrift shop wedding dress that gets used for everything but a wedding. All are honest, personal and profoundly moving.
As Anne Laurel Carter explains in her introduction, the pieces “fell easily” into four categories, so thats how the book is organized. “Something Old” looks at how traditions like honouring ones ancestors affected wedding dress choices, from a grandmothers gift to a fathers old leather jacket, but also at how such traditions can play a role in ways you least expect. The pieces in “Something New” focus on dreams for the future, whether that means breaking away from the expectations of ones family or choosing/creating a wedding dress (and a future) on your own. In “Something Borrowed,” writers tell of all the reasons behind borrowing (or trying to borrow!) dresses, for whatever reason, and “Something Blue . . . Or Peach . . . Or Striped . . . Or Floral . . .” looks at exactly that-the non-traditional choices women have made, and why.
These stories re-create the range of emotions that are invested in dresses and wedding days: confidence, optimism, hesitation, fear, fury and hope. When you work away at the seams, even the simplest of wedding outfits reveals all manner of memories and meanings. And whether youve been married or not, the stories in My Wedding Dress will have you looking back with new eyes on your own life, and exploring what the phrase “my wedding dress” means to you.
Contributors to My Wedding Dress:
Joanne Arnott
Anita Rau Badami
Adwoa Badoe
Sandra Campbell
Lorna Crozier
Rebecca Cunningham
Laurie Elmquist
Alisa Gordaneer
Jessica Ruth Harris
Kathleen Boyle Hatcher
Rosemary Hood
Michele Landsberg
Mary T. Malone
Jenny Manzer
Ami McKay
Jane Munro
Margaret Goudie Parsons
Gianna Patriarca
Elyse Pomeranz
Edeet Ravel
Kerri Sakamoto
Ilana Stanger-Ross
Darla Tenold
Jamie Zeppa
Foreword by
Stevie Cameron
Afterword by
Amy Cameron
Edited by
and with contributions from
Susan Whelehan
and
Anne Laurel Carter
Synopsis
In the tradition of beloved anthologies of women's essay writing, this collection offers twenty-six true stories from well-known writers and fresh new literary voices writing about a touchstone garment in a women's lives--the wedding dress. These are intimate stories about relationships; not just those between men and women, but between women and their mothers, friends and children. And, of course, with their wedding attire - a relationship that is sometimes simple, sometimes complex, but always fascinating in what it tells us about individual lives and aspirations.
Some of the tales are humorous - the bride whose skin turns fuchsia on her wedding night or the woman whose shopping-savvy aunt takes her to New York's garment district. Some are romantic - the woman who puts on her dress eight years after her wedding only to be caught by her husband when he comes home early from work or the quickie immigration wedding that turned into the real thing. Some are devastating - the bride who loses her mother to illness only days before her wedding or the woman whose mother tells of being kidnapped by her future husband. And some are revealing - the woman who wears her first wedding dress for her initiation ceremony into a convent and her second to marry her beloved; the dress that waited patiently in a shop window and then hidden in a box on a closet shelf; the same-sex wedding at age eighty; the thrift shop wedding dress that gets used for everything but a wedding. All are honest, personal and profoundly moving.
"Something Old" looks at how traditions like honouring one's ancestors affected wedding dress choices, from a grandmother's gift to a father's old leather jacket, but also at how such traditions can play a role in ways you least expect. The pieces in "Something New" focus on dreams for the future, whether that means breaking away from the expectations of one's family or choosing/creating a wedding dress (and a future) on your own. In "Something Borrowed," writers tell of all the reasons behind borrowing (or trying to borrow ) dresses, for whatever reason, and "Something Blue . . . Or Peach . . . Or Striped . . . Or Floral . . ." looks at exactly that-the non-traditional choices women have made, and why.
These stories run the gamut of experiences connected to the iconic dress and day. If we work away at the seams, even the simplest of wedding outfits reveals all manner of memories and meanings. And whether you've ever worn a wedding dress or not, the stories in this collection will have you looking with new eyes on your own life, and exploring what the words "wedding dress" mean to you.
Contributors:
Joanne Arnott
Anita Rau Badami
Adwoa Badoe
Amy Cameron
Stevie Cameron
Sandra Campbell
Anne Laurel Carter
Lorna Crozier
Rebecca Cunningham
Laurie Elmquist
Alisa Gordaneer
Jessica Ruth Harris
Kathleen Boyle Hatcher
Rosemary Hood
Michele Landsberg
Mary T. Malone
Jenny Manzer
Ami McKay
Jane Munro
Margaret Goudie Parsons
Gianna Patriarca
Elyse Pomeranz
Edeet Ravel
Kerri Sakamoto
Ilana Stanger-Ross
Darla Tenold
Susan Whelehan
Jamie Zeppa
About the Author
Both Anne Laurel Carter and Susan Whelehan are experienced authors and educators, and seeing this project come to fruition has been a thrill for them both. The genesis of the idea for
My Wedding Dress occurred six years ago at Whelehans home, where a group of friends, including Carter, had gathered for an afternoon of writing. The project was this: topics would be called out by different women, and everyone would write on each topic for fifteen to twenty minutes without stopping. Once the time was up, they would all read their pieces aloud to the group. As Whelehan writes in her introduction, the insight and emotions that pour out during activities like this are phenomenal: “There is a place where you go when you put pen to paper and write without pausing… It is not the place you would go if you were to call out a subject and then have a conversation. Oh no. Some say the truths of the heart flow down the arm and out the pen.”
On one particular evening the topic was “your wedding dress,” and all of the writers were surprised at the diversity and intensity of the pieces. The subject was so well-received that Whelehan later used it with another group of women, none of whom were used to writing, and it was a hit again. Right away she knew it would be a great idea for a book, but left it at that. Then, a couple of years later, Anne Carter called, full of memories of that night of writing and enthusiasm for the project of this anthology. So they set about making it a reality: drawing up lists of potential contributors, reading the many pieces sent in by women across the country, making difficult choices about what to include, and finally pulling the great variety of voices together into this anthology.
My Wedding Dress is the first of this sort of project for both of its editors, although both have made a career of the writing life. Anne Laurel Carters novel Last Chance Bay won the CLA Best Book of the Year Award while Under a Prairie Sky won the Mr. Christie Award for the Best Picture Book in Canada. The author of fourteen books, she has also been nominated for OLA awards. She lives in Toronto with her husband and four teens. Susan Whelehan works mornings teaching six- and seven-year-old children how to read so that they will some day enjoy the books she writes in the afternoons. She has written sixteen picture books for young readers, poetry for young and old, and co-authored Meditating Mamas: A Spiritual Resource for New Mothers with Rebecca Cunningham. She is currently writing for the award-winning childrens television show The Big Comfy Couch. Her husband and two sons help her with her garden in Toronto. Her wedding earrings still fit.
Table of Contents
Foreword - Stevie Cameron
Introduction - Susan Whelehan and Anne Laurel Carter
Part One: SOMETHING OLD
Bridal Pink - Anita Rau Badami
Green Silk and Black Leather: The Official Story - Alisa Gordaneer
Wedding Clothes and Marriage Blanket - Joanne Arnott
Knitted Together - Elyse Pomeranz
The Art Project - Jessica Ruth Harris
Part Two: SOMETHING NEW
Sunday Dinner and Wedding Dresses - Anne Laurel Carter
My Mother, My Wedding Dress - Ilana Stanger-Ross
A Simple Dress - Jane Munro
Until at Last - Kerri Sakamoto
With Patience She Stands Waiting -Rebecca Cunningham
The Past, the Pearls, the Politics - Susan Whelehan
The Wedding Promise - Jenny Manzer
Shop/Talk - Kathleen Boyle Hatcher
Part Three: SOMETHING BORROWED
Waiting-Room Wedding with Veil - Edeet Ravel
A Small Ceremony - Laurie Elmquist
Bride of Christ, Bride of Mike - Mary T. Malone
What the Photographer Didnt See - Sandra Campbell
Part Four:SOMETHING BLUE . . . OR PEACH . . . OR STRIPED . . . OR FLORAL . . .
Unbearable Whiteness - Michele Landsberg
Witness in Silk - Adwoa Badoe
My Sophisticated Suit - Margaret Goudie Parsons
Stripes - Jamie Zeppa
Journeys of Hearts and Second Halves - Darla Tenold
No Shoes Required - Ami McKay
Undressing the Brides - Gianna Patriarca
Dark Water - Lorna Crozier
Two Suits and a Closet - Rosemary Hood
Afterword-Amy Cameron
acknowledgments
contributors credits
photo credits
Reading Group Guide
1. As Stevie Cameron writes in her foreword, the white dress has only been a staple of Western weddings since Queen Victorias time. Discuss how attitudes about white dresses have changed, and how different writers in this collection have either embraced or rejected them. (See the Landsberg piece, for instance.)
2. Jessica Ruth Harris, a lesbian who bought her wedding dress for a performance art piece, found that it had a surprising effect on her. She kept the dress on display in several of her homes and it found its way into the projects of friends. Why is it that a wedding dress can have meaning even in the most unconventional of situations?
3. The pieces in this collection appear with photographs supplied by the authors. How did putting a name (or story) to a face, or seeing the wedding dresses in use, affect your reading of this book? Why do you think the editors felt the photographs were important? Lorna Crozier didnt supply a photo for a reason. Did you want to see one? What do you think her reason was?
4. Jenny Manzers mother died of cancer two days before her wedding; Margaret Goudie Parsonss wedding is inseparable from her grief over giving up a baby for adoption two years before, and her mothers death a year before that. Why do you think so many contributors chose to write about the pain of loss for this book?
5. Kathleen Boyle Hatcher remembers her aunts words as they shopped: “We could have looked at dresses all day, and you still would have liked that one. It was the same with Uncle Pete.” Compare finding the right wedding dress to finding the right person to marry.
6. Do a scaled-down version of the writing project that led to this book: have everyone in your book club write for a set amount of time (five minutes, even) about “my wedding dress” and then share their stories. Even women who arent married or the men in your group should give it a try-as this book shows, the wedding dress holds more than enough layers of meaning for everyone.
7. The stories in My Wedding Dress run the gamut from heartbreaking to laugh-out-loud funny to surprisingly tender. What piece(s) affected you the most?
8. Talk about those stories that illuminate religious ceremonies other than the usual Western/Christian variety-for instance, Joanne Arnott tells of Metis traditions and her marriage blanket ceremony; Anita Rau Badami tells of the many saris and events of her arranged Hindu wedding. What parallels can you draw between how wedding “dress” is approached in different cultures?
9. Susan Whelehan writes about how she still cant bear to part with her wedding dress, even though its lived in a box in her closet for years and she has no daughters to pass it on to. Why does the wedding dress, usually worn one day and then never again, have this effect on so many otherwise practical women? If you part with a wedding dress, what do you lose?
10. For many women, its as if wedding dresses come straight out of fairytales, embodying fantasies that have been dreamt about since childhood. Do you feel that way? Is this view of weddings and wedding outfits something to be treasured or to be dispelled?
11. Discuss how weddings - and more directly, the wedding dress plans - can bring an intensity to mother-daughter relationships, whether good, bad or just complicated.
12. Commenting on this collection, Catherine Gildiner writes that the wedding dress “is the perfect symbol of hope.” Do you agree? Or is it not quite so “perfect”?