Synopses & Reviews
In October of 1999 a doctor at a prominent Seattle hospital tells Lincoln Brown he has less than three months left to live. In the 89th year of his life, Lincoln chooses to return to his cabin in the rainforest of the Olympic Peninsula where his beloved Buddy'dog awaits and where he can die at home in his bed, the way he was born, in the company of his family. Just as we think about birth, hiring strangers in strange places to do it for us, we think of dying as a life event we prefer not to face and so we leave our elders to face it alone. David, who took care of his father for the last thirteen years of his life, and Rebecca for the last six, made a promise to Poppa that they would be in service to his wish to die at home. STANDING THE WATCH: The Greatest Gift is the story of Rebecca's exhausting and inspiring thirteen days. In a combination of log excerpts, emails, memories and essays about what she is experiencing and learning, Rebecca takes you on the journey of standing the watch of her father-in-law's final days, from when he comes home with his son, to when he leaves in a body bag. Sometimes humorously and sometimes panicky, she writes about the changes in someone she loves; the troubles with medications; the tension with doctors and clergy; her spiritual awakening and poltergeist beds. When her watch is done, and her world stands still, she offers her thoughts about death and dying, why we shun it and how we might learn from it. Rebecca ends her book with a colorful memorial service for a dear friend, where memories of his life are filled with tears and laughter and the thudding of the drums, makes her heart and spirit soar. STANDING THE WATCH: The Greatest Gift takes you gentlyinto one woman's world as her elder lies dying. You will experience her memories of other deaths and other lives, her fears, philosophies and angers, her fierce affection and joys, as well as occasional lighthearted moments. Day by day, memory after memory, you will be at Rebecca's side during one of the most difficult and thrilling times in the life of a family.
Synopsis
In this expanded second edition of STANDING THE WATCH: The Greatest Gift, R. J. Brown weaves excerpts from the medical log she had to keep for the State with memories, e-mails, essays & useful lists, as she stands The Watch for her beloved Poppa's final days. At 89 years of age, Lincoln Brown, in a Seattle hospital is told by his doctor that he has only three months left to live. Lincoln reminds his son that he promised not to let him die there, so they drive the six hours home across the Olympic Peninsula into the rainforest where Lincoln's cabin & his beloved Buddy-dog await. There, in his son & daughter-in-law's care, together with a home health agency crew, Lincoln prepares to die in his own bed, watching Blue Jays & Chipmunks feed on the picnic table outside his window. As we Baby-Boomers begin taking care of our aging parents we're faced with the last big question: How shall we leave this world? Standing The Watch at a home death is no walk in the park of peace & harmony, it can be frightening, time-consuming, worrying, stressful, unpleasant & tedious. It is also fertile ground for courage, discipline, stamina, spirituality, compassion, loyalty, humor & love. So who has the time to waste waiting for someone to die? There's nothing money can buy that gives more comfort. Nothing anyone can do or make other than give of their presence and time to bid you bon voyage. For in the meditation of Standing The Watch, you are in the pulse of life, totally present in the here and now, giving unconditional support. One moment we breathe, & the next we're gone. And the greatest gift? It goes both ways: you giving of your strength and caring, with the understanding that this time it isn't aboutyou, while your parents, for the last time, give you this once-in-a-lifetime experience. If you've decided to care for your parents in their final days, this memoir offers answers to your questions & comfort for your worries.