Synopses & Reviews
am I a partner?
am I forgiving?
am I a bad girl?
am I resilient?
am I enough?
In the summer of 2013, lying in a hospital bed, her body riddled with parasites, Maria Bello realized that waiting to do something isn't always an option. In a moment, everything could end, and all of her stories would be lost—stories of love, family, miracles, and madness that filled the hundreds of journals she had been keeping since she was a child. She read through each one of those journals during her months of recovery, and in the process began to uncover who she was and who she had become. And instead of coming to any definitive answers, she found herself asking more and more questions. One of the biggest questions she was asking herself at the time was how to tell her son, then 12 years old, that she had fallen in love with a woman. Jack's response—simple and wise beyond his years—was "Whatever, Mom . . . love is love." Realizing that Jack didn't see traditional labels of partnership, Maria began to contemplate the labels she herself had worn during her life.
Her essay "Coming Out as a Modern Family" was featured in the New York Times's Modern Love column and started a worldwide conversation about how so many of the labels we all know and still use today are simply outdated. Partnership, career, love, sexuality—all of these aspects of life are fluid now. We no longer fit into tidy little boxes, and neither do our lives. Questioning those labels is at the heart of Whatever . . . Love Is Love.
Written as a series of provocative questions and thoughtful answers, this book is filled with deeply personal, often funny, and even passionate stories, stories in which Maria bares her soul and shares what she's learned—not only about romantic love, but also about her relationship with her parents, her feelings about spirituality, her sexual identity, the highs and lows of her career, her humanitarian work, and her worth as a mother. Using her experiences as a gateway to a larger conversation, Maria encourages you to think about the life you lead, who you love, what you do, what you believe in, and what you call yourself . . . and helps you to realize that the only labels that matter are the ones we place on and accept for ourselves, even if they don't fit the mold of "typical."
Synopsis
The acclaimed actress and dedicated activist shares her personal journey of discovery, and destroys outdated ideas about partnership, love and family that will resonate with anyone in an unconventional life situation.
Actress and activist Maria Bello made waves with her essay, “Coming Out as a Modern Family,” in the New York Times popular “Modern Love” column, in which she recalled telling her son that she had fallen in love with her best friend, a woman—and her relief at his easy and immediate acceptance with the phrase “Whatever Mom, love is love.” She made a compelling argument about the fluidity of partnerships, and how families today come in a myriad of designs.
In her first book, Bello broadens her insights as she examines the idea of partnership in every womans life, and her own. She examines the myths that so many of us believe about partnership—that the partnership begins when the sex begins, that partnerships are static, that you have to love yourself before you can be loved, and turns them on their heads. Bello explores how many different relationships—romantic, platonic, spiritual, familial, educational—helped define her life. She encourages women to realize that the only labels we have are the ones we put on ourselves, and the best, happiest partnerships are the ones that make your life better, even if they dont fit the mold of “typical.”
Throughout this powerful and engaging read, Bello shares intimate stories and lessons on how she has come to discover her happiest self, accept who she is, and live honestly and freely, and tells the stories of those who came to her after her Times columns, grateful that someone gave voice to their life choices.
Whatever...Love Is Love is not a memoir about an actress. It is a frank, raw, and honest book about the way every woman questions the roles she plays in love, work, and life, filled with wisdom, questions, and insights relevant to us all.
About the Author
Maria Bello is an activist, actor, and writer. Her essay "Coming Out as a Modern Family" was one of the 10 most popular to appear in the New York Times's Modern Love column. She lives in Los Angeles, California.