from Life Lessons Learned as a Male Stripper for the S.S. — Sean Davis
I looked down on them all surrounding me, all their smiling faces framed by their furs and gaudy jewelry. I was really doing this, and not only was I really doing this I was going to be amazing, a memory that would last the rest of their lives. Hell, yeah. Then it started. The song I started my stripping career with was Danger Zone by none other than mullet wearing Kenny Loggins, and I gave zero fucks. I had passed the point of no return so I balled up my fists, started bouncing them around, and shot my hips back and forth. The theme to Top Gun boomed over the sound system and I nervously undid each button on my camouflage top and ripped it off with a flourish while some of the more respectable and affluent older women in Southern Germany acted like hormonal teenagers.